The Abominable Snowman Has Nothing For This

59054736123200914029PM The Abominable Snowman Has Nothing For This

My Curious Case of the Cottles have me feeling almost as awful as Mama T-Pain’s quick weave looks [almost] but the possibility of  Aretha’s titty balls emancipating themselves from mental slavery has perked me up for now.

With a choir backing her up and her nipples swinging lower than a sweet chariot, the love of Catfish Wilkerson’s life brought the house [and thankfully not the stage] down at the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree Lighting event on Wednesday night. Rachel Zoe, get you a piece whore!

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Double Take: Ya Jigglin’ Baby

rere1 Double Take: Ya Jigglin Baby

ReRe The Body received a standing ovation before belting out a sweet walrus yelp at Uncle Nelson’s 91st hoe-down over the weekend but I believe that the crowd’s burst of enthusiasm was  mostly due to the two mighty clouds of joy perched on her stomach.

I’ve been campaigning for her Aretha’s chest melons to be featured in a re-edit of Drake’s “Best I Ever Had” video to no success [Kanye refuses to let Team Chunk be great] but I am going to keep on pushing! There is no doubt that Catfish Wilkerson is holding up her double globes like Atlas every night.

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Jacking For Blogs: ReRe The Body’s Hat Beef

86352966.thumbnail Jacking For Blogs: ReRe The Bodys Hat Beef

Hijacked from The House of Rhymes With Snitch:

Aretha Franklin went on a local Detroit radio station talking slick about Mr. Song Millinery, the hat maker who created the grey felt hat she wore to the inauguration, because she feels she should get royalties from the sale of hats similar to the one she made famous. Aretha’s hat is one of a kind. You can get the style hat she wore, but not the color nor fabric. Anyway, catty Aretha went to the Kentucky Derby last week wearing another Song hat but when she was asked who made it, she said she didn’t know. Meow!

Photo-chopped & Screwed: Beyonce x Aretha

Today is a sacred day here on C+D. My personal Obama [copyright Neffie] ReRe the Body is celebrating her 67th birthday! Too bad the New York Daily News has jokes like a Laffy Taffy candy wrapper. Somebody thought that it would be a good idea to put Beyaki’s crown of glory yaki on our queen! Initially I was infuriated at this brazen act of blasphemy but I asked myself what would Catfish Wilkerson do and I decided to let it ride.

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Star Tracks: The Hat

57025047kdanick323200921459pm.thumbnail Star Tracks: The Hat

Aretha Franklin’s inguration hat was all over the place this weekend! Its first appeared at the SXSW [South By Sothwest] music festival on Perez Hilton’s tangy dome and then later in Detroit at ReRe the Body’s birthday party.  The Hat is by far more important and relevant than anyone else that I have blogged about today, how dreadful.

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Damn Vandals!

796981602.thumbnail Damn Vandals!

ReRe the Body is the latest celebrity to have their star on Hollywood Walk of Fame defaced by anti-fur protesters. The future [yes, still in the making] Mrs. Catfish Wilkerson’s plaque has been inscribed with the words “Fur Hag!” How dreadful!

While the Queen is most likely unfazed by the defacing there is a quiet peace in Mary J. Blige’s fur crypt today. While a little scribbling with a marker will never be able to wash all of the blood off of Kendu’s hands it did provide a bit of solace to K-Ci. And in the end, that’s all that matters.

In more pleasant news related to Aretha Franklin, the now-famous bow-tied, Swarovski-crystal church lady hat that she wore at the inauguration last week is in high demand by tacky women and vintage zestlemen around the world! Click here to read about the man who is responsible for the design.

84371742.thumbnail Damn Vandals! 843760601.thumbnail Damn Vandals!