Snooki is going to be a mother. Max B was sentenced to 30 years behind bars. Lil’ Kim is performing unreleased material in public. Its a hard week for the 5’3″ and under club.
Your worst fears have been confirmed. After years of factory assembly overseas Kimberly Jones has finally successfully turned herself into a Tekken character. No applause or Sega Genesis console necessary.
At the risk of repeating my entire Twitter rant I will just pose the most important question to you. What is the cheat code for Lil’ Kim’s fatality move? The streets want to know. More flicks from her appearance on BET’s Whip The Runaway below.
With her new crew the IRS (International Rock Stars) backing her, Kimmy Blanco jumps on the first single from Jay-Z and Kanye West’s Watch the Throne joint LP to drop some bird shit. She should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law for doing so if you ask me. Take a listen for yourself after the jump.
In somber times as the present it’s nice to know that Rich of FourFour, who has been the Nettie to my Celie since 2005, can still make me smile with my heart.
I’m a little late to this one, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t touch on my favorite person on TV this week, soul singer Millie Jackson. Her life story took up an hour of TV One’s Unsung (basically my favorite show on TV now – did you see last week’s Full Force episode?!?). And what a story it was! She got her break by shit-talking some woman that was onstage at a concert she attended. She described her marriage to a bass player like this: “He was a decent cat, but he thought we were going to be Ike and Tina, and the record company didn’t sign Ike, it only signed Tina.” She gave Roxanne Shanté these words of advice: “You’ll be successful a lot longer for the nasty things that come out of your mouth than the nasty things you put in it.” She made fun of her own music, lamented her inability to pawn gold records and showed that at age 67, she’s still quite flexible (you can see that in the video above).
While hosting a New Year’s Eve party at a hole in the walldent in the sheet rock nightclub in Pennsylvania swamped with sweaty neck patrons, Lil’ Kim grabbed the mic to let attendees in on the news that she and Mary J. Blige have plans to diss not only Nicki Minaj but also one-time collaborator Keyshia Cole on an upcoming track.
I think this other bitch got a song with Keyshia Cole, right? Coming at me and the mothafuckin’ other queen, Mary J. Blige. Me and my girl Mary J. Blige about to eat these bitches alive where they won’t even fucking exist no more and erase their fucking social security number! We gon’ remind them who the fuck we are! I’m not playing with this bitch for 2011. I’m saying, we can rock together but bitch you ain’t taking nothing from me!
God I hope Frankie isn’t up-to-date on her rabies immunizations.