1.29.2012 Guaranteed Fresh: Last Call

Posted by Fresh on January 29, 2012

joan11 1.29.2012 Guaranteed Fresh: Last Call » Joan Rivers read Chelsea Handler for filth. And it was fantastic.

» The Gospel According to Khia spread like wildfire last week after Thug Misses released her latest independent release, “Pussy Bill.” Be advised that there is a $3 convenience charge on all payments submitted online.

» Three million views later and Drake has yet to acknowledge the greatness that is Shit Drake Says with a simple LOL. Is it too on point for you to deal with, Drizzy?

» Waka Flocka Flames goes hard in the paint — and playground.

» Pastor Troy proved once and for all that he wasn’t about that life and became a trending topic in the process.

» Lola Monroe runs with the Taylor Gang boys on a new track

» Hollywood’s $130 million man  challenged his supporters to tap into their own potential in a video message posted to his Facebook fan profile.

Made From The Best Stuff On Earth |
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New Music: Khia — “Pussy Bill”

Posted by Fresh on January 23, 2012

kitty New Music: Khia Pussy Bill

Niggas like pussy and girls like money.

Although the proceeding could easily be mistaken as a text message of encouragement from Al Reynolds to Evelyn Lozada it is instead lyrics from a new song in Khia’s ever expanding hymnal of gutter bitch spirituals. Lift every voice and sing.

LISTEN NOW ON THE FURY

Come And Get Your Cousins Out The Studio Please |

From The C+D Vault: Khia’s ‘Miss Rap Supreme’ Most Memorable Moments

Posted by Fresh on November 18, 2011

2004-2008 weren’t the most productive years for Tampa’s thug queen Khia.

Refusing to sit back and watch her career turn to waste, the “Snatch The Cat” back rapper decided to place all of her Funyons on the table by competing in Miss Rap Supreme. The rest as they say is history.

Its Fun To Do Hood Rat Stuff |

Tweets Is Watching: Khia Attempts To Crash Beyonce’s Party

Posted by Fresh on October 26, 2011

tumblr lsmfy9yE3h1qers9i Tweets Is Watching: Khia Attempts To Crash Beyonces Party

Imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery to some but Khia isn’t swiping her EBT card in order buy into popular opinion.

Almost immediately after a teaser clip from Beyonce’s “Party” video featuring J. Cole (scheduled to debut in full later today) began making its rounds online, Thug Misses accused King B of ripping off the groundbreaking, highly conceptualized pool party visuals featured in the almost decade old video for “My Neck, My Back.”

“Thanks you for the love the tweets & roses. To bad I don’t bulldag with prego women. Call super head jay knows all about her,” Khia spammed to Queen Creole’s official account.

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Why Isn't CNN Covering This? |
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Words of Wisdom, Life Reflections and Other General Observations From Khia

Posted by Fresh on September 12, 2011

tears Words of Wisdom, Life Reflections and Other General Observations From Khia

Emotions tend to vary when Thug Misses allows fans to enter her controversial innermost sanctum. Some squeal in delight while others burst into tears (and flames) upon discovering that they are trapped inside her mind’s fourth level of ratchet hell. I just blink rapidly and try my best to hold on to the beauty of the moment for as long as humanly possible.

The raptress turned reality television contestant turned life coach touches on the benefits of self-employment, clears up recent rumors that her car was repossessed, goes in Georgia’s prison system, questions Tamar Braxton’s relevancy, attempts to offer Tameka “Tiny” Cottle some unsolicited marital advice, gives Lil’ Wayne all of her love and so much more in her latest Facebook blog entry.

THE WORD FOR TODAY IS J.O.B.

Stop working for the computer and let the computer work for you. Stay ya tired asses off Facebook and do your fucking jobs. Them whores be typing on the computer for free and aint got NAN Data Entry Specialist degree. If you gone be on the computer all day. Get Paid. Get MONEY BIIIIIIITCH!

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The Gospel According To Khia |

Crowd Reaction: Khia’s Latest Glam Shot

Posted by Fresh on August 23, 2011

Hide your keys, hide your car titles.

Gospel rapper Khia added another head shot to her already extensive portfolio of beauty after she was arrested on Saturday evening in Dekalb County, Georgia for “concealing/endangering property-secured interest.” Basically, Thug Misses got caught red handed unsuccessfully trying to duck the repo man. Hopefully next time around she takes a cue from Young Jeezy and hide the rest of the yams at her auntie’s house.

khia mugshot Crowd Reaction: Khias Latest Glam Shot“She looks like one of those people in The Wiz working in the factory before the rain washed away the ugliness.” — Darrell

“NO MISS SOPHIA NO! Seriously. I can bump to a few of her jams but sometimes, as a struggling artist, you just have to know when to sashay away. Time to gather up your bags of hair and put the titties away. Now head on over to the church kitchen to live out the rest of your days fryin’ chicken for God’s children until they comin’ fo’ to carry you home.” — Steven

“Her neck, her back, she hid it her crack!” — Culinary Chick

“This mug shot is hurting me. I mean they couldn’t have let her put on some lip gloss. Carmex or something?!” — Candice

What's A Goon To A Goblin? |

Why Won’t You Let Khia’s Wikipedia Be Great?

Posted by Fresh on July 26, 2011

I’m swinging my arms like Trey when he stopped by Brandy’s crib after being harassed by the police in Boyz n the Hood at this very second. Somebody thought it would be cute to give Khia’s Wikipedia entry a face lift with some creative writing. Here are some highlights from the defacing:

khia11 Why Wont You Let Khias Wikipedia Be Great?Khia Chambers, born Khia Shamone Finch (November 8, 1977), better known as Khia (pronounced /ˈkaɪ.ə/ ky-ə), is an American rapper, songwriter, singer, record producer, and respiratory infection. She is best known for her 2002 single “My Neck, My Back (Lick It)”, which became a top-five hit on the UK Singles Chart and pushed her debut album to gold-selling status in the United States. Most recently, Khia returned to the realm of relevance after posting a poorly written blog on her Myspace page.

Khia is set to work with Satoshi Tajiri in a live-action Pokémon film as MewTwo.

- With reluctance, Khia took to small studio in someone’s house and began recording. With a budget of a little over one thousand dollars, Khia produced an album which she described as a “sonically remixed version of some shit y’all nigga’s ain’t never heard of before.”

- In November 2006, Khia got into an internet brawl with high school cheerleader Ciara over the social networking site Adam4Adam. Ciara claimed that Khia sent him a message asking to collaborate on a track for the LGBT community. He declined Khia’s offer, and Khia filled Ciara’s inbox with smiles and pictures of her vagina with the words “Cinnamon Toast Crunch” as the caption. Ciara closed his account shortly afterwards.

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Why Isn't CNN Covering This? |

Watch This: Khia’s 50-Minute Long Video Rant

Posted by Fresh on July 13, 2011

The EF Hutton of the projects is back and presenting her rare of shade in high definition! Before reading her latest explosive blog The Queen spoke out against the media’s lack of coverage for the “afros, headwraps and thugged misses dresses down to the floor” event that was 2Pac’s 40th Birthday Celebration Concert. Don’t let the length of the video or her mic rubbing against her village feeders detour you from watching!

The Gospel According To Khia |

Quick Quotes: Khia Fires Off On Beyonce, Debra Lee, Rick Ross, Urban Fiction Website MediaTakeOut and More In Her Latest Blog

Posted by Fresh on July 8, 2011

khia confused Quick Quotes: Khia Fires Off On Beyonce, Debra Lee, Rick Ross, Urban Fiction Website MediaTakeOut and More In Her Latest Blog

Here’s a little fact about the internet you probably didn’t know: Every time someone types “bull dagger” online an angel gets its wings. And with her latest blog entry giving an A-Z analysis on her industry peers Khia was able to send plenty of them to flight school on a full ride.

As with all reading material presented by Khia prepare to clutch your pearls, rosary beads, and Swiffer wet cloths because you’re going to need all three to make it through. Here are the highlights:

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The Gospel According To Khia |

From The C+D Vault: The Greatest Khia Interview of All Time

Posted by Fresh on May 24, 2011

yasss From The C+D Vault: The Greatest Khia Interview of All Time

Never mind Jacki-O’s grapes of wrath tattoo.

The final scene in Waiting To Exhale is never going to happen among female rappers. “Ladies Night: The Sequel” went down inside Missy Elliot’s bedroom after she put the finishing touches on “Let It Go.” Da Brat was still locked up, she know what she was doing. Turn it loose and give it to Jesus, people.

During the peak of Khia’s beef with Jacki-O and Trina in Summer 2006 the “Snatch The Cat Back” rapper made it clear that the two had about the same chance as a pack of Ball Park franks inside Ricky Rozay’s refrigerator during Memorial Day weekend than ever making it in her BBM contacts during an interview with Ozone magazine.

I’m pretty without makeup. I don’t need a stylist and I don’t need thousand dollar hairdos. Keep it real, you know those hoes look a hot mess. You catch Trina early in the morning without all that makeup on her face and that hoe looks a hot mess.

She [Jacki-O] said I was a one-hit wonder and I looked a hot mess. Well, this is my hair. I’ve got dreads. I don’t need makeup and expensive hairdos to make me look like something. I’m beautiful on my worst day. I don’t have to get my ass pumped and I don’t have to walk around butt-naked to sell record.

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The Gospel According To Khia |
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