The Queen Has Spoken

khia kizzy.thumbnail The Queen Has Spoken

Ever have one of those mornings when you wake up feeling unfulfilled before you can even hop up out of bed to turn your swag on? Such was my plight today.

I couldn’t figure out what the missing link in my life was until a voice from the heavens spoke out to me in a loud thunderous voice and instructed me to visit Khia’s MySpace blog. I immediately fell down to my knees and rejoiced when the words “Mathew Knowles wit his dick slaying ass” appeared at the top of my screen.

.Mathew…..Mathew….Mathew….. In the case of Kelly Rowland and Mathew Knowles…. Mr. Knowles…… You are the FATHER!!! And Russell Simmons said that!!!! Nowwwwww….. Imma see if some dirt service out the clear blue sky on Russell!!! One time for Kimora….. I see you left that QUEEN and married that KING bare-faced and hair wrapped up like CLEOPATRA!!!! And I looooooooved it!!! All dat fake shit and make-up had to go fucking wit KUNTA….. Welcome home…… My Black Sista!!!! All Hail The Newborn King!!!!!!.

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Star Tracks: Kizzy Rowland

kizzy2.thumbnail Star Tracks: Kizzy Rowland kizzy3.thumbnail Star Tracks: Kizzy Rowland

The paparazzi recognizes her. That’s a good sign.

To say that I was concerned about Kizzy after her split from Papa Knowles’ management is an understatement. I don’t think I can deal with watching our precious Kelandria slanging slow jam compilations discs from Time Life at 4am at this point in my life. I’m sure Michelle Williams will probably end up doing that shit but Kelz deserves better.

She is more of a Pasta N’ More type of chick. She had a song with Trina, damn it. That trumps Michelle’s run on Broadway any day.

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Stans, Prepare To Self-Implode

56698853kdanick41200942327pm Stans, Prepare To Self Implode

Miss Jones is trying to earn herself a platinum roots box. If you thought she learned her lesson about fucking with Mama Tina’s dirty rice think again. Jonesy has more anti-Knowles venom waiting to be shot water gun style from her gap. Skeet skeet!

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Kizzy, Kizzy, Kizzy

wenn5181955.thumbnail Kizzy, Kizzy, Kizzy

Kizzy Rowland wants you to know that she wasn’t dropped from Columbia Records but parted with the company amicably.


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The Gang’s All Here

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I’ve got some good news and I’ve got some bad news. First the bad. Production is down in the wig crypt 47% this quarter due to the recession. Now the good. Kizzy, Beyaki, and Shug Avery have some extra itme to spend with each other now. Aww! It’s just like the video for “Girl” and shit.

The lovely ladies hooked up at Kizzy’s Surprise 28th Birthday Party on Tuesday night in Hollywood. Cousin Angie B!, La La Vasquez, Forest Whitaker, Busta Rhymes, Columbus Short, and a host of others came out to celebrate with Kiz.

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