Available for purchase online December 20 and in paperback form at nationwide stash spots the following month The Best Years I Never Had sheds light on Frankie’s darkest days.

I can’t wait for the book tour.

If dancing isn’t your thing, Frankie’s newest page turner is sure to keep you engaged. Published through Success Books and Media; The Best Years I Never Had takes readers through the pains of being a single mother on drugs, and Frankie’s fight to survive day to day. The petite powerhouse bares her personal struggles and uses them to offer women sincere, heartfelt understanding and candid advice about sex, drugs, and overcoming adversities.

“This book will inspire; it tells the story of a lady who’s been through everything from battling with drugs to resorting to prostitution and everything in between….this is her journey to turn her life around and merge into society.” Explains Frankie’s Manager, acclaimed author and platinum producer Leroy McMath, “She’s showing people that she has changed her life and they can do it too.”

With the help of her manager Frankie is setting her sights on a Hollywood, well public access, takeover with the creation of a variety show called “Frankie Digging Deep.”

“Getting clean seems like the thing to do because I have to bond with my children and I’m trying to get us all back together. And then that ain’t the only reason. It’s because I can’t find a man if I’m dirty,” she tells Sister 2 Sister.

Leaving blood on the dance floor is one thing. Scattering syringes everywhere is another. That’s all.

With Bankhead’s own walking memorial sperm bank Shawty Lo at her side, Frankie debuted the next dance craze that will eventually make its way to 106 & Porch’s Wild Out Wednesday stage earlier this week. And yes that’s her blaring voice pumping through your Beats By Dre headphones.

Oh, bother.

I tried my hardest to resist making a crackhead wisecrack comparing The Frankie Leg to The Gator but I’m going to just have to ask Based God for repentance on all that later.

According to a recent string of Twitter updates from Keyshia Cole mom Frankie’s days of serving fuckery sunny side up to anybody who would allow themselves to be entertained by it (and I’m pointing the finger at you) are a thing of the past. Francine has been keeping busy by devoting her energy to turning both her wig and life around.

“4 those who CARE. My mother Frankie’s much better. More mature, Not cursing around DJ, N she weighs more than me. Think she doin sumthin. LOL,” Cole tweeted to fans.

“I love her like this,” she continued. “She’s such a wonderful, funny, loving, caring grandmother. She’s getting along with my mom Yvonne. Like living a dream.”

Things have been relatively quiet on Keyshia Cole’s family forefront (Neffe’s uterus hasn’t made a peep in months) since mom Frankie turned over a new leaf after announcing her sobriety. No news is good news for that funky bunch.

Our boy Freddy O captured younger sister Elite’s softer more non-ratchet gut-a-bitch-like-a-fish-for-jumping-the-line-at-Cici’s-Pizza side during one of his “Power” photo shoots. If you are feeling his work and will be in the Atlanta area this Sunday stop by 659 Auburn Avenue to have glam shots of your own snapped. Listen to Mama Fresh and seize the opportunity to straight stunt on everybody you grew up with on Facebook!

. . . okay Elite.

That Agent Cody Banks is one bad momofuka.

Has any child star ever emerged unscathed from the system? I can’t think of a single one. The latest ‘aw, he used to be so adorable!’ scandalizer is Frankie ‘Malcolm In The Middle’ Muniz, best known currently for snarky and amazingly sassy Twitter responses to haters.

According to Phoenix police reports, Muniz’s surprisingly hot (although he’s been pretty vocal about saving up a lot of money) girlfriend Elycia Turnbow called in a 911 domestic violence report. When police arrived, they removed a gun that Muniz had reportedly been holding to his head, threatening to shoot himself. Turnbow told the police that Muniz punched and shoved her, and she called one of his bandmates because she thought he should go to the hospital.

Wait. This is shocking. Frankie Muniz is in a band?

Cut to one day later, and the couple are all Twitter pictures of their romantic Valentine’s Day evening out, replete with commentary from Muniz declaring his love for Turnbow. Beyond that, neither of them have made statements about the event. Aw, punk rock love! So misunderstood and dramatic.

Your cousins in the Metro Atlanta area started their day off on a high note by waking up to Frankie this morning without being cited for soliciting a prostitute.

Wearing one of her signature synthetic clearance bin wigs and a pair of sunglasses from the Salvation Armani Spring 2007 collection, the woman responsible for giving KeyLoLo life, liberty, and the pursuit of self-imposed family exile spoke in her best job welfare to work interview voice on Good Day Atlanta about cleaning up her act for good on the upcoming season of Celebrity Rehab.

Keeping their pockets packed to the hilt and their coins stacked, VH1 and Dr. Drew Pinsky have decided to begin a new season of the hit series ‘Celebrity Rehab.’

Joining the likes of Rachel Uchitel (Tiger Woods’ jump-off and number one head mistress), Janice Dickerson, and other illustrious addicts is none other than BET’s matriarch media mogul Frankie Lons. Well known for her reality show coonery and public outings in which she appeared quite . . . well drunk, she will appear on the show to seek help for her addiction(s?) and to foster a new, healthy lifestyle.

Brandy and Ray-J thought they had the VH1 block on lock.

I ran off to the gym to sneak in a hour worth of cardio after hearing the news that Burger King will now be offering ribs on their menu only to return to a press release about “The Neffe and Soullow Family Tree.”

Times like this make me wonder if life is really worth living or am I just going through the motions. A little help here?

Neffe and Soullow of the Frankie and Neffe show will be moving forward with their life as they continue to excel towards their goals and the goals of their children. They will make a public announcement via the internet letting the world know about the many things they have to come and the many things going on with their family. James DuBose of DuBose Entertainment will bring into the homes of many, a new reality show entitled “The Neffe and Soullow Family Tree” (http://www.duboseent.com). While the family has decided to move along and continue to make life better for their children Frankie will be making life better for herself separately pursuing other opportunities.

The Neffe and Soullow Family Tree will consist of 8 family members who are all growing and striving to be the best they can be, shedding light on their community and trying to make a change. The show will depict how Neffe and Soullow get involved with their community while also aiding their children to follow their dreams as Neffe and Soullow pursue dreams of their own as they prepare for their wedding.

My reaction via Kid Fury

(Images courtesy of  Straight From The A)

Is Derek Blanks too busy giving his other clients the star treatment to photoshop your pain away? Having a hard time finding a reliable glam squad to make your face beat up their Sonia Kashuk brushes? Look no further than photog Michael Antonio and his crew to give you life, and give it to you more abundantly!

Anybody who can morph this

into creole magnificence and radiance can snatch up my hard earned dollars any day.

These exclusive Straight From The A shots of EBT’s top rated mother and daughter duo were preliminary snaps taken at a photo shoot for a new line of puppy chow SB Shades.

Now you’ve officially been chopped and screwed.