Chops And Hops, a steakhouse located in the heart of Buttfuck, Georgia, has a long tradition of giving menu items tongue-and-cheek names after celebrities. But many customers lost their appetite after the restaurant posted a photo on its Twitter and Facebook profiles on Friday (March 23) of a burger with the following caption:
“Well we were going to do @TimTebow today but decided to trade for a sure thing this week. Instead @chrisbrown, @rihanna and us teamed up for a award winning celebrity sandwich. Put your hands on this caribbean black and bleu sandwich. Caribbean spiced marinated sliced ribeye blackened then look out for the bleu cheese, sliced tomato, silver Lamborghini onions, and shredded romaine. Chris Brown won’t beat you up for eating this unless your name starts with a R and ends with A.”
“Chris is a nice guy and everybody’s entitled to make mistakes in their life. God knows how many I’ve made,” Ronald Fenty told Heat magazine. “She’s her own woman now.”
But the fatherly talk didn’t stop there. He tells the publication that he inspired daughter Rihanna’s svelte figure by having a kee kee or three at the expense of her weight.
“When I saw her this time, I thought she was back to her normal size. I used to joke with her, ‘Robyn, you’re getting too fat!’ But I think she’s fine, I think she looked excellent, as everyone saw, at the Grammys. She’s dieting, she’s working out.”
It should be noted that the following gossip blurb comes from the fortress of journalistic truth known as the National Enquirer and therefore should be taken with a grain of salt. Or rice. Or rice cake crumb. Whichever you prefer, just know that it’s not worth getting your panty liner in a bunch over.
According to the rumor mill Chris Brown’s girlfriend Karcoochie Train delivered an ultimatum to the enchanted forest’s hottest commodity after find racy text messages from ex-flame Rihanna.
Chris Brown couldn’t conceal his jiggy when the DJ dropped Rihanna’s “We Found Love” at Club Vain on Sunday during his NBA-All Star Weekend finale party. Watch video of Yellow Cake Cake Cake Cake Cake Cake Cake singing along under the jump.
Before performing the track “Gunpowder and Lead” from her 2007 album ‘Crazy Ex-Girlfriend’ country star Miranda Lambert held up a fan-made neon green poster bearing the words “Take Notes Chris Brown” to let her fans know that her feud with Chris Brown is far from over.
Since watching Chris Breezy perform and pick up a trophy at the Grammys last Sunday, the singer has taken it upon herself to jumpstart a feud with Brown, or publicly condemn domestic violence, depending on your view, Entertainment Weekly reports.
“Get a good picture now, put it on Twitter,” Lambert told the crowd during a show at the University of Massachusetts on Thursday. “I’ve been in a world of hurt with Chris Brown fans lately . . . but see, I just have to speak my mind because where I come from, beating up on a woman is never okay.”
After the crowd applauded the singer then smirked, “So that’s why my daddy taught me early on in life how to use a shotgun.”
As you have probably suspected (thank you, rap music gods), “Gunpowder and Lead” is about a woman who decides to shoot her abusive husband: “I’m goin’ home, gonna load my shotgun/ Wait by the door and light a cigarette/He wants a fight well now he’s got one/He ain’t seen me crazy yet.”
This won’t end well. It doesn’t help that I watched ‘And Their Eyes Were Watching God’ on Lifetime yesterday. The mental image of Chris Brown foaming at the mouth before being blasted is too much for me right now. Roll that beautiful bean footage below.