Sexual Napalm: Chief Keef

chief keef Sexual Napalm: Chief Keef

While you would never purposely get a tattoo on your neck that resembles a dirty patch of eczema, that particular body ink placement is more than fitting for Chief Keef, no?

Now that rhyming like one has a mouthful of piping hot cream of wheat is widely accepted in the rap community, Gucci Mane’s latest mentee in the Big Brother Big Sister program took his talents to New York City for a performance at the Best Buy Theater last week.

The government name of a jazz saxophonist and the face of a felon. My how the mind wonders. I would hit it and watch it scurry back under the kitchen counter. Dim the lights.

Girls All Pause: Is Chief Keef Engaged?

ck2 Girls All Pause: Is Chief Keef Engaged?

I know she’s out there.

Have you ever danced with the devil under the pale moonlight? Chief Keef isn’t denying reports that he is engaged.

MTV.com reports that the teenage rap heartthrob tweeted and Instagramed (it’s really 2013) a headline from a popular urban fiction website that he is engaged to booty meat model Pretty Mesha. Woman, hold your head and cry.

The two made their love social media official last week after Keef posted a picture of his lady love rocking a red Glory Boyz Entertainment sweatshirt — and what appears to be a diamond engagement ring on her left hand. Check out the picture after the jump!

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People You Should Be Paying Homage To: Chief Keef’s Grandma

ck2 People You Should Be Paying Homage To: Chief Keefs Grandma

Margaret Carter, grandmother of Chief Keef, is splitting her White Owl cigars with a lot less tension in her hands tonight. The controversial 17-year-old rapper was released from jail on Thursday after serving 60 days for violating probation on a gun charge.

“I’m so glad he’s coming home because it hurts my soul that he’s locked up,” Carter said a day prior to his release. “Oh, it wears and tears on me.”

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Watch This: A Touching Acoustic Cover Of Chief Keef’s “Love Sosa”

chief keef Watch This: A Touching Acoustic Cover Of Chief Keefs Love Sosa

On the seventh day God made acoustic covers of rap songs. Here is a beautiful rendition of Chief Keef‘s soul stirring coon tune “Love Sosa” performed by the president of One Direction’s digital fan club.

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Back & Forth: Chief Keef Shares His Morning Wood On Instagram

chiefkeef Back & Forth: Chief Keef Shares His Morning Wood On Instagram

Beng! Beng! This morning, rapper Chief Keef unleashed his inner sex kitten by posting the above picture to his Instagram account. These bitches love Sosa.

Fresh: This is his submission for a 2013 calendar featuring today’s sensual indentured servants, clearly.

@NiiiceLookSean: Rundu calendars for the submissive bottoms? Mary Magdalene didn’t sell pussy for this.

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Your Daily Tang Multivitamin: Chief Keef

ChiefKeef Your Daily Tang Multivitamin: Chief Keef

Twitter After Dark couldn’t come fast enough for Chief Keef recently as he sent an open invitation to all variations of trade by way of his Instagram account.

Nevermind that he appears a couple months pregnant. Smelling like Newports and Old English 800, Chief Keef showed off his favorite designer belt and other assets for your personal pleasure. Who says you can’t wear white after Labor Day?

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