Go-Go-Gadget Yaki Wind Machine! 24 Moments From The Mrs. Carter Show World Tour

beyonce mrs carter Go Go Gadget Yaki Wind Machine! 24 Moments From The Mrs. Carter Show World Tour

I usually saunter up to the main stage in order to allow lessers to take in all of the greatness stuffed inside my Body Magic that night tip drag performers who make my heart smile with their theatrics in single dollar bills, but you’ve caught me on a Monday afternoon — and I’m clean out of cash.

Considering the fact that I usually pay the wig crypt as a collective in dust, a post highlighting Our Lord And Gyrator Beysus Christ shaking her ass at the Barclays Center on Saturday night (August 3) is not only a solid arrangement but also right on target.

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Style File: The Time Beyonce And Jay-Z Wore Coordinating Denim Outfits On TRL

beyonce jay z denim Style File: The Time Beyonce And Jay Z Wore Coordinating Denim Outfits On TRL

Let’s see what we have here. Timberland Manolo Blahnik boots, a denim dress made from assorted pairs of mom jeans, and two drawstring ponytails perpetrating as a full wig topped by a Yankees fitted. Are you still bowing down or nah?

If you scale the wall outside of their luxury apartment (that’s how Mathew Knowles dropped off his wedding invitation earlier this year, but that’s shade for another day) and peek inside of a window you may find Jay-Z celebrating the platinum success of ‘Biblical Magnum Condoms’ with wife Beyonce this week.

But unless there is a Country Crock plastic tub filled with Bey Bey’s famous Hamburger Helper waiting for our arrival who really gives a shit? Let’s travel back to 2002 and revisit their casket sharp appearance for TRL’s Spankin’ New Music Week.

Fun fact: Every article of clothing contained in these pictures can currently be found in the closets of LeToya Jackson and Rihanna.

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Free Advice: Beyonce Needs To Lay It Down On A Pull-Out Sofa Bed And Stay There For A Week

‘I can do all things through yaki that strengthens me’ is a category on C+D, not a lifestyle. When your general health and wellness gives a blood curdling cry of “Retreat! Your track is showing!” from the mountain tops and you choose to ignore it, the end result is all on you boo.

Doctor orders be damned, Beyonce hit the stage a day after having to cancel her Tuesday, May 14, show in Antwerp, Belgium from suffering dehydration and exhaustion. By the grace of Based God it didn’t hit her ass back.

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Quick Quotes: Meshell Ndegeocello Politely Offers Keyshia Cole A Seat

Singer Meshell Ndegeocello took to her Facebook to share her thoughts on Beyonce’s new buzz song, writing:

meshell Quick Quotes: Meshell Ndegeocello Politely Offers Keyshia Cole A Seat

I really felt good when I heard the new Beyoncé track “Bow Down / I Been On.” The energetic frequency transcends the lyrics and that’s beautiful.

Keyshia Cole, “there is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women” – Madeleine Albright said that once and it rings true. Stop critiquing people and lets support one another in the world.

I, too, once felt it was necessary to give my two cents but the world is in real need of more detailed, nuanced analyses. Don’t take things out of context.

“Bow Down / I Been On” is no different than the swagger many MC’s take AND IT’S FUN! Most of all, my body wants to move to it.

Keyshia Cole Performs At The 2012 Soul Train Awards

When Free Wifi Goes Wrong: Keyshia Cole Trashes Beyonce’s “Bow Down”

keyshia beyonce When Free Wifi Goes Wrong: Keyshia Cole Trashes Beyonces Bow Down

We don’t think this is what Maya Angelou envisioned when she penned “Still I Rise.” She also never counted on Key Lo Lo ever making her way off Black Planet.

Just when we finally gave Keyshia Cole her well deserved props for motivating our cousins to enroll in Dudley’s Beauty College in order to beat whatever heat would be generated from them doing sew-ins inside their kitchenettes this summer, she committed a cardinal wig crypt sin —  she shared a negative critique about Creolepatra Jones.

C+D can’t save you in the real world.

After hearing Beyonce’s brand spankin’ new buzz track “Bow Down”, Keyshia saw it her duty as a tax dodging citizen to tell the people how she really feels about the song’s greater than thou undertone.

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The Angry Complaints To The FCC About Beyonce’s Super Bowl Halftime Show Are A Great Read

beyonce11 The Angry Complaints To The FCC About Beyonces Super Bowl Halftime Show Are A Great Read

The wig crypt can’t pay everybody off. Beyonce “gyrating her vagina” in “a stripper-like provocative fashion” while “licking her fingers seductively” during her Super Bowl halftime show was too much for some people.

Deadspin has compiled a list of angry complaints to the FCC about Queen Bey “humping the air for 13 minutes” and its a frickin’ hoot and a half.

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