Free Advice: Beyonce Needs To Lay It Down On A Pull-Out Sofa Bed And Stay There For A Week

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‘I can do all things through yaki that strengthens me’ is a category on C+D, not a lifestyle. When your general health and wellness gives a blood curdling cry of “Retreat! Your track is showing!” from the mountain tops and you choose to ignore it, the end result is all on you boo.

Doctor orders be damned, Beyonce hit the stage a day after having to cancel her Tuesday, May 14, show in Antwerp, Belgium from suffering dehydration and exhaustion. By the grace of Based God it didn’t hit her ass back.

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Quick Quotes: Meshell Ndegeocello Politely Offers Keyshia Cole A Seat

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Singer Meshell Ndegeocello took to her Facebook to share her thoughts on Beyonce’s new buzz song, writing:

meshell Quick Quotes: Meshell Ndegeocello Politely Offers Keyshia Cole A Seat

I really felt good when I heard the new Beyoncé track “Bow Down / I Been On.” The energetic frequency transcends the lyrics and that’s beautiful.

Keyshia Cole, “there is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women” – Madeleine Albright said that once and it rings true. Stop critiquing people and lets support one another in the world.

I, too, once felt it was necessary to give my two cents but the world is in real need of more detailed, nuanced analyses. Don’t take things out of context.

“Bow Down / I Been On” is no different than the swagger many MC’s take AND IT’S FUN! Most of all, my body wants to move to it.

Keyshia Cole Performs At The 2012 Soul Train Awards

When Free Wifi Goes Wrong: Keyshia Cole Trashes Beyonce’s “Bow Down”

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keyshia beyonce When Free Wifi Goes Wrong: Keyshia Cole Trashes Beyonces Bow Down

We don’t think this is what Maya Angelou envisioned when she penned “Still I Rise.” She also never counted on Key Lo Lo ever making her way off Black Planet.

Just when we finally gave Keyshia Cole her well deserved props for motivating our cousins to enroll in Dudley’s Beauty College in order to beat whatever heat would be generated from them doing sew-ins inside their kitchenettes this summer, she committed a cardinal wig crypt sin —  she shared a negative critique about Creolepatra Jones.

C+D can’t save you in the real world.

After hearing Beyonce’s brand spankin’ new buzz track “Bow Down”, Keyshia saw it her duty as a tax dodging citizen to tell the people how she really feels about the song’s greater than thou undertone.

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The Angry Complaints To The FCC About Beyonce’s Super Bowl Halftime Show Are A Great Read

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beyonce11 The Angry Complaints To The FCC About Beyonces Super Bowl Halftime Show Are A Great Read

The wig crypt can’t pay everybody off. Beyonce “gyrating her vagina” in “a stripper-like provocative fashion” while “licking her fingers seductively” during her Super Bowl halftime show was too much for some people.

Deadspin has compiled a list of angry complaints to the FCC about Queen Bey “humping the air for 13 minutes” and its a frickin’ hoot and a half.

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The Financial Records Of Bokeem Woodbine Remain Safe During Hacks, Beyonce And Others Not As Fortunate

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1 The Financial Records Of Bokeem Woodbine Remain Safe During Hacks, Beyonce And Others Not As Fortunate

Two-step identity verification can’t save you in the real world. A website published credit reports, mortgage payments, Social Security numbers and more of Jay-Z, Beyonce and Kim Kardashian — as well as First Lady Michelle Obama, Mel Gibson and Paris Hilton.

Also victimized were Britney Spears, Donald Trump, Hulk Hogan, Ashton Kutcher, Vice President Joe Biden, FBI Director Robert Mueller, Attorney General Eric Holder, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and human paper weight Sarah Palin.

Hulk Hogan, my dude? I’ll give you everybody else but you need your ass beat for that one. Card carrying Hulkamaniac speaking, and I’m tight. [New York Daily News]

2 The Financial Records Of Bokeem Woodbine Remain Safe During Hacks, Beyonce And Others Not As Fortunate

A source tells Star magazine that when House Mother Kanye and Kim Kardashian would run into Anna Wintour around New York Fashion Week, Anna would blow HMK air kisses and shit but refused to even look at his Malibu Barbie. Jesus, hold my mule. [Dlisted]

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