Damn It!

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Damn It!

fw1 1 Damn It!

Alright so you got me. Forest’s wonk game is almost untraceable in these pictures. You better enjoy this while you can because the second he slips up I am going to do a post about it.

The entire Whitaker gang came out to with mom to the Kissable Couture launch in Los Angeles last night. Awww, mini-whitakettes.

Earlier this month F Dubb teamed up to develop “DEWmocracy,” a virtual world that will allow consumers to create the next Mountain Dew beverage online. ‘Cause scattered eyes and soda go hand in hand.

You Know You Want To Smash

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You Know You Want To Smash

schatar1 You Know You Want To Smash

Tell the truth and shame the devil, you wouldn’t hit this?

Shittar Schatar “Hottie” Taylor had a busy night at the 2007 Fox Reality Channel Really Awards on Tuesday. She presented, performed, and looked putrid. My hero.

I’m just saying, why is she always dressed like the low income housing version of one of these scary ass dolls?

doll1 You Know You Want To Smash

Ole!

schatar2 You Know You Want To Smash

Foot Soldier

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Foot Soldier

TOE1 Foot SoldierNeed more proof that we are living in the last days? Look no further.

Meet Carlton Davis.

The Minnesota man, 26, is facing felony charges for allegedly stealing a cell phone and purse from a woman he mugged on a St. Paul street early Saturday morning.

According to police, after the woman turned over her belongings, Davis announced, “Now I’m going to suck your feet.” Which he did, after the 24-year-old victim removed her shoes. Davis, who fled when passersby approached, was apprehended by cops a few blocks from the crime scene.

He was booked into the Ramsey County lockup, where his mug shot was snapped.

My soul’s publicist declined to comment.
[Thanks R Love & Ana]

The Hills Have Eyes

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The Hills Have Eyes

jh 1 The Hills Have Eyes jh 2 The Hills Have Eyes jh 3 The Hills Have Eyes jh 4 The Hills Have Eyes

BET Awards Backstage Creations Talent Retreat

I love Jennifer Holliday like long weekends and free cable but I never realized her wonk game was so strong. Seriously, her eyes are scattered like hash browns. It looks like if you press down on her eye lids those things are going to pop up like the dice inside that plastic bubble on the Trouble game board.

Yeah, I don’t think I am going to bother reproducing. I talk about people entirely too damn much.

[Thanks Reen for destroying me, thanks a lot.]

Hottie Wants Her 40 Acres And A Mule

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Hottie Wants Her 40 Acres And A Mule

schatar Hottie Wants Her 40 Acres And A Mule

After the latest episode of Charm School aired on Sunday, Shittar Schatar sent an angry email to the VH1 blog staff demanding that it be posted. This negro is delusional.

Let’s keep it real. The judges should have kept it tight and reviewed the film the same way they did for the etiquette segment.

My character was defamed. This was obvious and clear bias. I was crucified – hung on an emotional cross!

Hugs don’t get it. We are out here in the real world.

I demand a PUBLIC APOLOGY from the girls and the judges, televised on VH1 and I demand my own Shopping Couture with Schatar from the VH1 network immediately.

At a minimum, Mo’Nique should have said, “Schatar if I am wrong about this, I will offer you an opening act on tour with me, the way I offered Goldie to go on tour with me and implied assistance to Krazy about her CD.”

My millions of fans would appreciate a publicized apology from the judges and the girls on the reunion show.

Also, VH1 can develop and air a show starring me called Shopping Couture with Schatar. I would look forward to collaborating with a reputable production company contracted with VH1 to develop and bring this show starring me to air within the next 6 months.

Schatar Taylor
www.myspace.com/MONEYBANKSMUSIC

Quick Quotes

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Quick Quotes

hottie1 Quick Quotes

Double the pleasure, double the tangled eye! You know you love it.

“I am the Tiger Woods of the screen. He calculates his moves and goes towards the winning stroke. That’s exactly what I did. It was about being strategic and knowing your opponent.”

“Also I played a gang leader on ‘America’s Most Wanted.’ Thanks to our episode they were finally able to apprehend the criminals and finally bring justice. As an actress you must be versatile. Just like the greats like Halle Berry, Reese Witherspoon and Jennifer Garner. You have to be versatile to play the role.”

“I am not a gold-digger. But I do believe in abundance and prosperity. I believe in living a lush life with couture and I try to live each day to the fullest.” — Schatar “Hottie” Taylor speaks candidly to BV columnist Jawn Murray

Throwing Shade

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Throwing Shade

shade2 Throwing Shade

The Last King of Wonkland In Cape Town, South Africa

Whenever Forest Whitaker’s wonky eyes are covered the planets align, squirrels hum “Zippity Doo Da” and pixie dust falls from the sky. Enjoy this magical moment while you can because he will be back to his normal, tangled ways before you know it.

shade1 Throwing Shade

Keyshia Cole & Lorena Cartagena (Fat Joe’s wife) At Mansion In Miami, 4/20

Keyshia a/k/a Assless Chaps wearing a pair of sunglasses inside a nightclub may not be a big deal to you but it is enough to make me pace the floor at night clutching my pearls.

Is she hiding from the flash of the paparazzi’s lightbulbs? Did she accidentally poke one of her pupils while trying to apply eyeliner? Did Youg Jeezy blackout during a session of love making and serve her ass up with a two piece special? What in the I-wear-my-sunglasses-at-night hell is really going on?

shade3 Throwing Shade

Scott Storch & DMX Also At Mansion

I’m not even chartering into this territory on a Monday morning.