We all have that one friend.
They have access to our Netflix usernames and passwords, begin most general phrases with “I know this muthafuckin’ ain’t just”, has the ability to convert EBT swipes to cash without missing a beat, and always keeps a sandwich bag inside their Coogi purse for the sole intent of the unlawful transportation of Gummi Bears from the dessert buffet at Golden Corral.
We may walk 50 yards ahead of them during shopping excursions and hold conversations through messages on Facebook instead of commenting out in the open because we doubt if Luanne Schultz from human resources can fully appreciate their colorful musings on how a police road block tossed a monkey wrench in their scheduled trip to the weed man but we love, honor and obey them without ever raising question. Not out of fear. But out of respect for ourselves. Because really, who wants to wear the cloak of shame that is detailing a physical confrontation about a misunderstanding over ranch flavored sunflower seeds?
We tuck away our pride because we know that if shit were to ever pop off inside the bathroom at $2 Tuesdays they would be right there, Four Loko mimosa in hand, ready to stomp a mud hole in a bitch for us.
A true friendship that will span a lifetime. If you feel like calling in to work and staying home to watch ‘Beaches’ I fully understand.
Long before The Secret Squirrel Lady and Momma Dee reigned supreme on reality television, Ann Iverson was the opening act, the headliner and the after-party. If she is on AOL Instant Messenger her away message is without a doubt “Don’t come at me with no bullshit, use caution.” Word to DMX.
My friend, instead of getting yourself all worked up the next time you are confronted with comments you don’t agree with, fly above all the drama by responding with one very simple question: Did Tawanna tell you that?
This week, YouTube sensation Sweet Brown hit up Hot 97 to chat it up with Rosenberg and K. Foxx about the things she has time for, which don’t include the return of the McRib or abandoning her 27-piece quick weave hairstyle.
Quite the girl about town (because I don’t want to use the phrase “concrete jungle” for obvious reasons), SB also made a quick appearance on ‘Watch What Happens Live.’
Regardless of your personal assessment of Gucci Mane‘s contribution to the landscape of hip-hop, you’ve got to give him credit on one thing: There are few, if any, artists out there still talking big shit and taking names with absolutely no end to their gestation period in sight. Resiliency is a trait often ignored by many in our culture. Well, until somebody gets shot.
Gucci Mane: Body On Me
It’s no wonder why all of your cousins were walking around like it was the middle of June this weekend. The trap was too hot.
On his snarling new track dissing Young Jeezy, God’s most beautiful creation yet Gucci Mane claims that Keyshia Cole is responsible for melting the Snowman’s heart by having an affair with P. Diddy while the two were involved in a relationship. Secret industry love triangle tea? Pour us a cup.
“I did a song with Keyshia Cole and I know you still miss her / But Puff was fucking her while you was falling in love with her,” raps the East Atlanta permanently congested trap star.
Now, you know Neffe and Soullow tipped Keyshia off about the track, right? World Star Hip Hop is their homepage. A family that keeps up with the latest struggle rap and hood fights together, stays together.
Before shooting friend Monica a quick text to double check the body count on the pistol she purchased at the Love Don’t Live Here Any More garage sale she held post Rocko break-up, Keyshia took her beef with LeFlair’s claims on the track straight to the tweets.
Many plastic surgery procedures before NeNe Leakes scheduled her first zoom whitening appointment for the magnificent veneers she purchased using Trump Check funds, Queen on the Scene was protecting the likes of Betty White, Phoebe Price and Taraji P. Henson from paparazzi swarms by escorting them back to their vehicles. The reality star turned actress struck a pose with the freelance bodyguard as she worked her Beverly Hills beat in 2009.
In a recent interview with Vibe magazine, Leakes revealed that her decision to return back for the fifth season of ‘The Real Housewives of Atlanta’ was difficult.
Seeing Red: NeNe Steps Out In The Big Apple
Have you ever been overcome with the urge to j-sette and finger wag in the presence of someone else throwing shade? That’s what happened to me after reading the following news blurb over at Rhymes With Snitch.
Baltimore native Jada Pinkett-Smith reached out to Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake to protect Ringling Bros. elephants by upholding the city’s ban on the use of bullhooks when the circus rolls into town.
“Unlike me and other actors, elephants do not choose to perform. These endangered elephants will soon be in your jurisdiction,” writes Pinkett-Smith. “My friends at PETA and I join animal advocates across the state in asking for your leadership in holding Ringling accountable and requiring the circus to comply with Baltimore’s absolute prohibition of the use of devices such as bullhooks.”
But, Steph is Ray Charles to the bullhooks — and Jada. She didn’t even bother to respond to Pinkett-Smith’s letter (that was strike one), telling a local news station, “We’ve reached out about homelessness, about school issues. I would have loved to gotten some feedback, support or concern about those issues that are very pressing to the city.” That was strike two.
Rawlings-Blake then added that she has enjoyed visiting the circus since her childhood. That shit was strike three.