Uncle Bernie’s choice of material at a surprise appearance Friday night at a fundraiser for Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama endured heckling and campaign rebuke.

Toward the end of a 10-minute standup routine at the Hyatt Regency Hotel in downtown Chicago, the 50-year-old star of “The Bernie Mac Show” joked about menopause, sexual infidelity and promiscuity, and used occasional crude language.

“My little nephew came to me and he said, ‘Uncle, what’s the difference between a hypothetical question and a realistic question?’” Mac said. “I said, I don’t know, but I said, ‘Go upstairs and ask your mother if she’d make love to the mailman for $50,000.’”

As the joke continued, the punchline evoked an angry response from at least one person in the audience, who said it was offensive to women.

“It’s not funny. Let’s get Barack on,” a man shouted from the crowd, which paid $2,300 each to support the Illinois senator.

About 15 minutes later, Obama tried to smooth things over with a joke of his own.

“We can’t afford to be divided by race. We can’t afford to be divided by region or by class and we can’t afford to be divided by gender, which by the way, that means, Bernie, you’ve got to clean up your act next time,” Obama said. “This is a family affair. By the way, I’m just messing with you, man.” [source]

If you have been renting dick [ahem] from Scott Storch you may want to find another wholesale supplier. An arrest warrant was issued Wednesday morning after he failed to appear for a recent hearing on child support for his 2-year-old son Jalen.

SOHH reports that Storch has continued to miss monthly payments of $7,500 since December. Today he owes $30,000 in delayed payments and another $16,000 for his son’s Prepaid College Plan.

Storch has also been hit with another paternity suit. 33-year-old Vanessa Bellido says Storch is the “natural father” of her 16-year-old son Steven Brandon Bellido.

According to the paper, Storch had previously acknowledged he is Steven’s dad and voluntarily sent money — up until January. Now, Bellido says she and her son are struggling.

“While [Storch] drives around in his Ferrari and Cadillac, [Steven] is sleeping on a couch in the same room with his mother,” says her emergency petition for child support, filed by attorney Paul Leinoff. “The situation is dire.”

The producer is also behind on property taxes for his $10 million mansion. According to the Miami Herald, Storch owes a half-million dollars in back taxes on his $10.5 million Miami Beach estate.

Powder better hit the lab and cook up some hits so he can pay off his debts. Don’t be mad, UPS is hiring.

You know that white sheet that church ushers drape over women when they fall out after catching the Holy Ghost so that the congregation can’t get a glimpse of their goodies? Yeah . . . that’s the only thing missing.

The rapper Papoose exploded in a fit of anger outside a Manhattan courtroom this morning just moments after his tearful bride-to-be, Remy Ma, faced down an eight-year sentence for shooting a woman outside of a West Side hot spot last summer.

Papoose—whose plans to wed Remy got put on ice yesterday when he was allegedly busted trying to sneak a handcuff key into Rikers—exchanged some hard looks and words with friends of Remy’s shooting victim, Makeda Barnes-Joseph, in the courtroom hallway.

“Get the fuck off me. Fuck ya’ll. Fuck jail,” screamed Papoose as his 10-person entourage restrained him and court officers told him to move it along and exit the hallway outside of Manhattan Supreme Court. “I don’t care. Lock me up. Lock me up. Take me to jail. Arrest me. It’s all about money.” [source]

Remy told the media,”Reporters and newspapers have called me a ‘hardcore rapper,’ a ‘hip-hop harlot’—Remy Ma is just a music industry name. A facade. I’m not a thug. I’m not a hardcore anything. I have feelings. I’m Remy Smith—No, I’m Remy Mackie. I’m a wife, mother, daughter and big sister.”

You can now add big Bertha’s bottom bitch to that list too. TTYL!

I hurt for Kimberly Jones. I really do.

New York’s CW11 News was on hand as Ms. I-Want-Christina-Milian-To-Play-Me-On-The-Big-Screen [just tragic] received a visit from the repo man. The Queen Bee’s Bentley was placed on the repo list when she fell behind on car payments. [watch the video] Ha! This makes me appreciate the fact that the Kia is paid off even more.

When asked to make a comment about the rising tide of automobile repossessions Kim responded, “Get the fuck outta here, you are so fucking ridiculous!”

If there was ever a time to start peddling ass it would be now, Kimberly.

This is some shit straight off of Parking Wars. If you ever want a good laugh at other people’s expense I suggest you tune in. The Philadelphia Parking Authority doesn’t play!

I can’t wait to read what Khia has to say about this. Her year round bus pass is paid in full baby! She’s such a responsible queen. Thanks Burnt Grits for the story!

Wesley Snipes was sentenced to three years in prison Thursday for failing to file tax returns, the maximum penalty. Ha! I bet he will make sure the gub’ment gets that cake from now on.

Snipes’ lawyers had spent much of the day in court offering dozens of letters from family members, friends — even fellow actors Woody Harrelson and Denzel Washington — attesting to his good character. His attorneys recommended he be given home detention and ordered to make public service announcements because his three convictions were all misdemeanors and the actor had no previous criminal record.

But U.S. District Judge William Terrell Hodges said Snipes exhibited a “history of contempt over a period of time” for U.S. tax laws, and granted prosecutors the three-year sentence they requested — one year for each of Snipes’ convictions of willfully failing to file a tax return from 1999-2001.

“In my mind these are serious crimes, albeit misdemeanors,” Hodges said.

Snipes apologized while reading from a written statement for his “costly mistakes,” but never mentioned the word taxes. [source]

It’s officially National Konvict Music Day. Tell a friend to tell a friend! I’m breaking out the grill at 5 PM sharp.

Remy Ma was led out of a Manhattan courtroom Thursday, weeping and in handcuffs, after being convicted of shooting her friend outside of a club last July.

The defense had conceded that Cognac Jack fired a shot toward Makeda Barnes-Joesph after she suspected her of stealing $3,000, but said it was an accident.

“Keep your pistol, fuck a fight.” - - Pimp C

The trial began at noon. As the diverse jury, consisting of many cultures and ages, read their verdict, Remy placed her head on the table in shock. She was found guilty on four charges, including assault in the first degree, criminal possession of a weapon and coercion. She was not charged with gang assault, witness int intimidation or witness tampering from a separate incident.

Remy was then cuffed and escorted out of the court. As the door closed, she could be heard crying out, “Oh my God.” A female officer rushed to calm her down.

Remy’s brother hollered out, “This is bullsh*t,” as the verdict was being read. The judge ordered him to be escorted out of the court room. Remy’s stylist cried.

“We are very disappointed with the jury’s verdict,” Fisher told SOHH. Remy wasn’t ready for this. We plan to appeal all of the assault related charges.”

“Remy didn’t expect this,” Fisher continued. “She didn’t tell her 8-year-old son, who she left this morning [she would not be returning home].”

“They all lied,” Remy’s brother told SOHH in an outrage outside of the Manhattan court building. “They lied to the police and they lied on the stand,” he added as he told a reporter to stop snapping photos. [source]

A few supporters of Barnes-Joseph cheered and wept when they heard the verdict. Some chanted “bye, bye” in an almost taunting singsong as Cognac left the courtroom.

Remy is looking at 25 years in prison. I’m getting teary-eyed just sitting here thinking about all the HAM-tastic moments we have shared together on this site. I . . . I don’t want to talk about it any more.

Another man with titties behind bars. When will this vicious cycle end? Somebody call Al Sharpton please!

The brother of late crooner Gerald Levert sentenced to prison for not paying child support. Sean Levert will spend the next 22-months behind bars.

Levert owes $85,427.68 in back child support for his three children - ages 11, 15 and 17.

Levert was sentenced Monday by Judge Nancy Margaret Russo.

He did not speak at his sentencing. [source]

[Thanks Jade P.]

You know what this means right? No more shirtless flicks for a minute. Take me now Lord!

Rapper T.I. was expected to plead guilty Thursday to federal weapons charges and will face prison time, according to two people familiar with his case.

The 27-year-old singer, whose real name is Clifford Harris, was expected to be sentenced to 1,500 hours of community service talking to youth groups around the country, followed by about 12 months in prison, according to two people familiar with the negotiations who spoke on condition of anonymity because the plea deal had not been finalized yet Thursday morning . . .

His prison time could be increased or reduced, depending on his fulfillment of the terms of the deal and good behavior, the two people familiar with the negotiations said. His talks to youth groups are supposed to be about the pitfalls of guns, gangs and drugs.

The U.S. Attorney in Atlanta announced a change-of-plea hearing was scheduled Thursday afternoon at the federal courthouse. Prosecution officials were expected to speak to the media after the hearing.

U.S. District Judge Charles Pannell Jr. must approve the deal.

Harris was arrested Oct. 13, just blocks away and hours before he was to headline the BET Hip-Hop Awards in Atlanta.

He was charged with possession of unregistered machine guns and silencers, as well as possession of firearms by a convicted felon. He faced a maximum of 10 years in prison and a $250,000 fine for each count. [source]

Fantasia, Young Dro, Big Kuntry and myself have already volunteered to help Tiny take care of A Tribe Called Harris while Clifford is lockdown. Between the four of us the household should run smoothly.

[I love Kurtis Blow, couldn’t resist]

In the latest sex scandal to rock US politics, the mayor of Detroit was indicted Monday for lying under oath about an affair with his chief of staff and firing a police officer investigating reports of a wild party at the mayor’s mansion.

The charges against Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick were filed after the mayor abruptly instructed the city to settle a wrongful dismissal lawsuit by three police officers who said they were fired while investigating wrongdoing by the mayor and his security personnel.

He refused to step down from the city’s top job today and vowed to fight a string of charges he and his former chief staff Christine Beatty were facing in connection with 12 felonies, including perjury, obstruction of justice and misconduct in office. [source 1 & 2]