Archive for the 'Oh Tyra' Category

Smile With Your Forehead, Tyra

Posted by J. Cooper on November 6, 2009

tyra head Smile With Your Forehead, Tyra

With a new album set for release by The Barbadian and Tyra “finally” debuting her real hair, foreheads have definitely made a comeback.

However, these type of comebacks are not without their faults. Peek the picture above. Here, we have Empress of the Foreheads, Tyra. Pouting, thirsty, and looking quite tardy for the party is never a good look. Especially when your cranium is bigger than the grill of a Mack Truck. I’m quite sad she didn’t try smiling with her forehead.

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Oh Tyra |

Buzz Notes: Tyra Launches “Magaline”

Posted by Fresh on September 10, 2009

tyra22 Buzz Notes: Tyra Launches Magaline

Anna Wintour, you better watch your back. A new lace front wearing mogul is coming for your throne.

Tyra Banks, our favorite model-who-seeks-validation-in-others-through-stunts-and-revelations, has decided to launch an online fashion “magaline” that will focus on “beauty, fashion, healthy living and relationships.” There also will be behind-the-scenes footage from America’s Next Top Model, The Tyra Show and random ass photo shoots. The site kicked off yesterday at 5 PM with a competition to fast-track one application for Cycle 14 of America’s Next Top Model.

Well, lets hope the magaline will feature more helpful content than screaming and crying about weight and baby hair lace fronts. Her steez is starting to get old, real quick.

Read Tyra’s manifesto for her new project after the jump. Don’t fret Fantasia’s of the world, there’s audio of her enunciating every syllable of her spoken word available too.

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Good Luck With That, Oh Tyra |

Get Used To Hearing “Daytime Emmy Award Winner Tyra Banks”

Posted by Fresh on August 31, 2009

tyra 1 Get Used To Hearing Daytime Emmy Award Winner Tyra Banks

Somebody fucked around and let Tyra finally be great at something other than trying to be great at everything Ananda Lewis was already great at [including Chris Webber]. And we’re never going to hear the end of it. Ever.

Rachael Ray and The Tyra Banks Show won the talk show categories at the Daytime Emmy Awards for the second consecutive year on Sunday, while the women of  The View ended Ellen DeGeneres’ four-year reign as best talk show host. With the talk show category split into two for the second time, Rachael Ray took home honors for the “entertainment” talk show side while Tyra Banks scooped the “informative” prize.

“I love daytime television,” said Ty Ty Baby when accepting her show’s win in the informative talk show category. “I learned the birds and the bees from watching [General Hospital characters] Luke and Laura. I learned my ABCs, 1-2-3 from Sesame Street. This [Emmy] is for the women out there that do not feel beautiful . . . that do not have time to do their makeup. . . . This is for you guys.”

Slow. Hand. Claps.

Gold Star For You!, I Can Do All Things Through Yaki That Strengthens Me, Oh Tyra |

Quick Flicks: Tyra Banks Participates In A Flash Dance Mob

Posted by J. Cooper on August 17, 2009

tyra dance Quick Flicks: Tyra Banks Participates In A Flash Dance Mob

Tyra Banks this past weekend was caught by the paparazzi participating in a Flash Dance mob in New York City. Dressed all in black, America’s favorite talk show host [side-eye] flung her arms and body into a spiritual frenzy. Now she’s going to claim on her show that she is really good at dancing, tragic.

Leiyomi would not be pleased.

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Oh Tyra, Whores For Propaganda |

Quick Flicks: Tyra + Her Man In Maui

Posted by Fresh on June 15, 2009

tyra boyfriend Quick Flicks: Tyra + Her Man In Maui

Ty Ty Baby, her immaculate lace front, and boyfriend John Utendahl are enjoying some vacation time in Hawaii. According to photographers she was “very sweet” to her man while the two shared a romantic dinner together later in the evening.

SHAM. FUCKING. WOW. Quween obviously doesn’t think the safety of these two is important enough to travel outside of the Los Angeles metro area to protect so I am going to just keep it moving.

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C+D Candids, I Can Do All Things Through Yaki That Strengthens Me, Oh Tyra |

Quick Flicks: Tired Tyra

Posted by Fresh on June 4, 2009

88149988 Quick Flicks: Tired Tyra

Ty Ty Baby looked like she should have hit the snooze button on her alarm clock a couple more times while she posed for pictures at the Visionaire 56 Solar event earlier this week. Her sleepy appearance make her look rather gaunt, no? Girl, stop trying to tackle issues that no one gives a shit about and take your ass to bed at night.

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Girl Bye!, How Dreadful, Oh Tyra |

Ty Ty Baby Won’t Let Paulina Porizkova Be Great

Posted by Fresh on May 19, 2009

Paulina P. Tyra

Oh, Tyra. If you are going to fire somebody do that shit Knowles style. Put all of the contents from their desk inside a Hefty bag and place that shit out on the curb while doing the “to the left, to the left” creole shake.  Giving a bullshit excuse isn’t going to cut it.

“The current state of the economy has forced shows to make major budget cuts industry wide,” says America’s Top Model executive producer Ken Mok, in a joint statement with Tyra Banks released Monday. “America’s Next Top Model is not immune to these financially challenging times. We’ve had to make significant cuts in every area of the production and, unfortunately, Paulina was a casualty of these cuts.”

According to Paulina she was handed the pink slip because she had a big ego, baby such a big ego. Since Ty Ty Baby is trying to be recession friendly and all I wonder what low budget bitch she is going to get to fill Paulina’s spot. Any suggestions?

Don't Be Mad UPS Is Hiring, Fuck The Recession, Oh Tyra |

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