What the hell is a job application doin’ in my bag?! Jesus! Get that piece of normal the hell away from me! — Moosefan
And I’m ashy and defeated! — Joi H.
Lawd, this humidity and my new nose got me smellin my own coochie. — Traci M.
I want to pet that dog, Keisha, come tie thios pork chop around my neck. — Streeter T.
I may be a MESS but I damn sure know I don’t stick no candied yams or kool-aid in MY vajayjay! — Aneesah S.
Although I’m putting my money on it that she does it anyway, if Toni Braxton were everyday people she would probably be the type to give a weekly update on all the career strides she is making during church announcements and then turn around and hit everybody up on the low for gas money in the parking lot following service. Call it Facebook Fronting Syndrome.
But I digress.
Since there weren’t any scheduled grand openings for bags of Funyuns in the tri-state area for today she opted to turn out for the 2011 Lindt Gold Bunny Celebrity Auction Kick-Off at the Lindt Chocolate Shop in New York City and pose dramatically like an Ebony Fashion Fair Runway model.
Too much Tyra, not enough Iman.
If maintaining an existence free of all perils associated with a creole dominated society hasn’t harden your exterior already, The House of Agnes wants to ‘toughen’ up your look with a limited edition of both basic and deluxe (?!) temporary tattoos, People reports.
“We decided to invite Temptu to help us create custom body art for her to model with our fashions,” Tina Knowles, Deréon’s founder, designer and creative director, told WWD. “The resulting images were so strong that we realized consumers might want to re-create the tattoos themselves.”
The waterproof tattoos will be offered in Deréon’s signature fleur icon and in chains, spider designs, rocker bolts and jewel baubles-giving you a two to five-day edge. The $16-basic kit has eight tattoos and all the pieces needed to affix the designs on your skin, while the online-only deluxe kit will retail for $34 and includes a signed photo of Beyoncé as well as a chance to win a trip to New York. To pull your biker-chick look together, visit Sephora or dereon.com
The ’10 graduating class of Rupaul’s Drag University just got their life. The rest of us, not so much.
From the illustrious House of Jamie Foster Brown:
Real and Chance ride again: The brothers are gearing up for an adventurous new show on VH1.
The network announced that the Stallionaires will return to their lineup next month with “Real & Chance: Legend Hunters.” On the show, the brothers will go out in search of the truth behind creatures of natural lore. In their travels, Real and Chance hope to determine whether Hogzilla, Big Foot, the Loch Ness monster and the man-eating Catfish of Kali River are real.
Retired Officer Latarian Milton Sr. arrived in chopper style at his album release party at Miami’s King of Diamonds on Tuesday night. The loud “Boom!” local residents reported hearing shortly after he touched down had nothing to do with the helicopter’s imminent engine failure but more with my twin Kid Fury being unimpressed.
Moments after instructing his GPS to locate the nearest paparazzi, Mario was spotted late last night departing from Abe & Arthur’s walking hand in hand with girlfriend Dez. For the lucky individuals not in the know, Dez is the Gayle to Robo Bot’s Oprah. Or something. Now she can proudly add the titles Sam’s Choice of Celebrity Girlfriends and useless morning website content to her growing resume. Gold star for you!
