Skeet or Delete: Up Out My Face
It comes as a no mistake that a commercial for Pepto-Bismol was shown prior to the first time I watched this Target commercial of a fucking video. Blame Vevo. Nausea, heartburn, indigestion! Upset stomach, diarrhea!
Archive for the 'I Blame Nick Cannon' Category
The Princess Diaries
With her lambs looking on in fear that she may take a Scarlett-like tumble from the sky, Mariah Carey arrived in princess style at her concert at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel in Hollywood, Florida on Thursday. Aretha needs to get on the fast track to weight loss so she can make the same entrance at this year’s BET Awards. In the immortal words of Eightball, stop playing games hoe.
Until that happens, here’s a little Friday bonus for you to enjoy.
Rewind: Mariah’s Inebriated Acceptance Speech
In between giggles and burps, a tipsy Mariah Carey accepted her award for Breakthrough Actress Performance for her performance in Precious at the 2010 Palm Springs International Film Festival gala on Tuesday night. Director Lee Daniels tried to make light of Mimi’s obvious drunk behavior but his demeanor said it all. This one is for all the kittens and lambs [namely Nick Cannon] out there!
From a queen to a diva, this is the shit, well, you know, Saturday Night Live sketches are made of. iLive in HD!
Feast On This, Lambs
The only thing missing is a Carls Jr. cheezburger.
I tried to close my eyes and click my heels twice to turn these pictures of Mariah Carey frolicking around on set of “H.A.T.E.U.” into a behind the scenes video of the Summer 2010 campaign for Ashley Stewart but my lamb power is obviously running low today.
All the butterflies and unicorns in the world can’t stop Mooriah Carey from showing off her God given curves [that's what we are calling them from now on] to anybody that will look. You’re looking, you’re looking! On a more serious note, I can only imagine the types of Pixar Studio shit that will have to be done in post edit. Visit Dlisted for more puppy power!
Rewind: Mariah Carey Trippin’ On Leno
Mariah Carey and her “girls” almost pulled a Scarlett while being introduced on Leno’s late night show earlier this week. Sanrio’s favorite customer, however, was able to compose herself and keep it moving. Waving and smiling as if nothing ever happened, our favorite 5-octave singer who exists in a perpetual state of adolescence lives to go on to fight the good fight for the lambs. Expect Eminem to compose a diss song about this occurrence in the coming days.
Buzz Notes: Mariah Cancels Promotion
Mimikins has been quiet as a church mouse since receiving a lyrical beat down from Marshall Mathers and putting on a tired, uninspired live performance on her husband’s show [which is also rumored to have been pre-recorded].
Word on the curb is that her new album, Memoirs of a Husky Angel, has not only been pushed back but she has canceled all upcoming promotion.
Roll that beautiful bean footage!
Mariah has canceled her appearance on the TODAY show which was previously scheduled for August 28, 2009 and will be replaced by Miley Cyrus, NBC has announced today.
This is one of many recent postponements and cancellations of recently scheduled events: VH1 Storytellers, Clear Channel Tribeca show, Receiving Walk of Fame Hollywood Star, The Today Show and the MTV Video Music Awards.
Mariah’s management and record label are unwilling to divulge any information regarding the cancelled events but we suspect the reason is another postponement of Mariah’s new album release date. It appears to be that Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel will not be released on September 15, 2009, but at a later, currently unknown date.
Some say she is shook due to her ongoing beef with Eminem while others believe its because Whitney Houston is back feeling like a million dollar bill. What do you think?
Somewhere, Eminem is Seething . . .
. . . but don’t fret folks. He’s probably throwing a smile in there every moment or two. Last night on America’s Got Talent, Mariah performed her new single “Obsessed.” Just like every performance of Mariah was in the last couple of years, it was boring, contrived, forced, and just forgettable.
Not throwing Mariah under the bus, but I feel that she’s better than the crap that she has been putting out lately. Voices change and although she may not be able to hit those 5-octaves easily [Minnie Riperton did it and she didn’t falter, but that’s another conversation], she can still do age appropriate material [Willona Woods] and still have the people jumping. Also, lip-syncing? Hell, even the Barbadian sings live.
Another one bites the dust.
