Archive for the 'Good Luck With That' Category

Make It Last, Mr. and Mrs. Skeletor

jlo1

What better than a depressing flick to jump start the day.

Not too many people think that J. Lo’s marriage to Marc Anthony is going to stand the test of time but for some odd reason I am actually rooting for her.

More than anything she reminds me of the home economics teacher from my high school who would come back each school year with a new last name after marrying a different rich pepaw. On the first day of school negroids would look at their schedules happy as hell to be in the classroom of a new teacher only to find out its her punk ass.

But I digress. Make it last forever, kids:

It always looked like Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony made beautiful music together - well, OK, maybe not beautiful music.

Alright, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony made horrible music together. And some genuinely terrible films. But at least they looked happy, and that’s what’s important. Except that they’re probably not happy, since they’ve both been seen without their wedding rings lately, sparking rumours of an impending divorce.

Apparently it’s all because Jennifer Lopez thinks Marc Anthony is too controlling - plus Marc is furious about that time he got sucked halfway up J-Lo’s bumhole when she bent over and created a giant vacuum.

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Quick Flicks: Angel Lola Luv’s B-Day Party / Burlesque Show

Angel Lola Luv Angel Lola Luv Teyana + Angel

Although I believe that Angel Lola Luv should stick to selling ass and not try to convince people that she has any other real world skills outside of that  I will give her half a hand clap for stretching her 15 minutes. That’s not an easy thing to do! There is always somebody out there with a bigger more surgically enhanced ass, better tits and prettier face.

But until you meet your match, peddle pussy like there is no tomorrow! And that’s the best advice I can give you. More possibly NSFW pictures after the jump.

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Cover To Cover: Teyana Taylor In Black Beat

Teyana Taylor Teyana Taylor

Black Beat is still around.

Popular Harlem pound puppy Teyana Taylor infused her tomboy style with menswear in a fashion spread for Black Beat titled ‘If I Were A Boy.’ Go on and take the bait and insert your own tranny joke [here] while I try to figure out why this chick is relevant.

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Another Day, Another House Back On The Market

T-Boz

I guess its safe to say that Tionne’s little garage sell last month wasn’t a success. TMZ reports that her nearly 10,000-sq. ft. home will be auctioned off in January 2009. T-Boz defaulted on the original principal of her mortgage [around $530,000] and so now the state is taking the five-bedroom house.

Time to move in with Takeo!

Cover To Cover: Ciara For Elle

Baby Sykes gets glam  while rocking the dress of MaxMara in the January issue of Elle magazine. Her single “Never, Never,” produced by Meerkat The Don, is slated to drop soon in preparation for the release of her new album, Fantasy Ride.

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All I Want For Christmas Is . . .

Khloe Kardashian Khloe Kardashian

A travel size edition photoshop! I haven’t pushed a kid out of my vagina yet but I’ll be damned if I don’t have a couple of stretch marks I would like to get rid of. It’s clearly done wonders for this broad. She went from looking like she ordered steroids online to all dainty and lady like. I wanna be made over!

Kim Kardashian’s younger sister [I'll never understand] Khloe is standing up for her fellow furry peeps by posing nude in a new PETA ad. She better not come around Mary J. Blige trying to preach this shit. Willona Woods is no Rachel Zoe, hoe. Thanks Jakki!

Girl, You Overcame Adversity

I never forget a good mug shot. Remember the chick who was arrested along with Michael Vick’s brother, Marcus, for public intoxication after a heated argument in back June? Turns out she is video vixen  [die phrase die] Delicia Cordon.

Not that anybody gives a fuck but I am proud of myself for remembering her face. This is what happens when you follow the Dwight Eubanks sex three times a day method of living. Not only will you look and feel younger but you will amaze your friends with excessive amounts of useless trivia! Get like me.

But I digress.

Seems like Delicia  has bounced back from the situation and is selling ass to top men’s publications. Press on my sister, press on! See, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Bust it baby is what I call you.

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The Rock Is In The Building

Lil\' Rock, Monica + Romelo Lil\' Rock, Monica + Romelo

Lil’ Rock’s hand ever so delicately caressing his upper thigh in the second picture - - not today.

From the same prestigious design house that brought the world She by Sheree [I keed, I keed] presents Regions of Rock! The clothing line is slated to be in stores [read: Goodwill throughout Metro-Atlanta] just in time for Christmas.

Please go out and support Mo’s entrepreneurial spirit! She is trying to feed her babies! I would suggest also buying a copy of Rocko’s Self Made album but nobody is trying to have that shit in their stocking this year.

[Flicks via Straight From The A]

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