Plenty of us have hit the same move in an attempt to unstick wet napkins from the bottom of our shoes while cutting a rug in the middle of a sweaty black club dance floor.
But this shit?
SAD LIL’ MAMA FACE RATING [OUT OF 5]
Quick Quotes: LisaRaye On Her Black Men’s Magazine Cover Shoot
“I’m so upset about that because let me tell you they were not supposed to use that picture. I was sick on that photo shoot. It was 23 degrees out there in that dessert. I didn’t feel pretty. I didn’t feel sexy. I was just like let me try to pull this off. In the midst of that you get a couple pictures that [are] not appropriate. You should have enough tastefulness and integrity about yourself as a photographer and as a publisher [to say], we are not going to use this shot because she was getting in to position. ‘We are not going to use this shot where her nipple is showing because that is not appropriate. We are not going to use this butt shot because she’s an older woman, she’s a mother, and she’s not Diamond. And that’s exactly what it was. If you look at my facial expression on the cover, it’s almost if I’m going “huh?” I was in the middle of fixing my hair. I’ve been there done that. It took me right back to my video vixen Diamond days, which is not fair to me. It’s not fair to a former first lady and it’s not fair to a single mother who’s an older woman now.”
Oh, First Lady Diamond. You happily signed on the dotted line to exchange fuck faces. If you were that adamant about the way you would be represented chances are you would have turned down the offer to appear in the magazine in the first place. Selling ass is what got you here to begin with. Wallow and relish in it the same way you did that puddle of mud.
READ MORE AT HONEY
Jacking For Posts: Baltimore, Get Your Girl
Harpo, who this woman?
Judging from the way she pronounced “YouTube” it was easy to peg her as a resident of Baltimore Baldamo, Murrland. Or as she and other choice locals like to call it, Bodymore, Murderland. With a nickname like that it’s no wonder the town also branded as Charm City is such a tourist haven.
Let me quit clowning before I get a bunch of hollow points left in my comment section. Some of my favorite people on Earth are from Baltimore. This girl, however, isn’t one of them.
To be fair, she’s not a bad rapper at all. She has some issues with breath control but given the size of her stomach I can understand why. That’s either a baby in her belly or a 20 piece nugget at McDonalds.
If it’s the latter, I can’t blame her: A deal is a deal. Had a friend not told me one late night on a post-club excursion to Mickey D’s, “Michael do you really want to eat that?” I might have fallen victim myself. Still, let’s not make reference to calories in our rhymes. Less is more. Figuratively and literally, baby.
Nevertheless rapper Keys’ eating habits or baby making plans aren’t the problem, her pushing beef for publicity is.
Although I’m fallen under Nicki Minaj’s spell I can see why some people still don’t like her. The Barbie thing is a stretch for someone to push at her age, but evidently it’s working. Working so well Keys took the time to film a video in front of the projects to diss the hell out of her.
Maybe it’s because I’ve already contemplated legally changing my name to Mickey Minaj for at least six months for the hell of it, but I don’t think this girl’s diss is all that impressive.
Yes, she can spit but she’s essentially calling Nicki Minaj childish and saying she’s too old for toys yet she’s ranting about busting guns and robbing folks.
Rewind: Que Serves Fever In Response To Rumors
Instead of hashing out their issues by pulsating their pussies in unison on a cardboard box in front of the Bad Boy offices like dignified sistas from another mista Que and Willie went back back fourth and fourth over Que’en being booted from Day 26 in the negro “media.” Necole Bitchie did a fine job at breaking that whole situation down but me? I can’t and I won’t.
But I will share Que’s desperate pleas with you. What he needs from you is understanding. And acting lessons.
That’s the gotcha gotcha.
Freeze Frame: Lil’ Wayne’s Afterbirth Album Cover
A bug’s fucking life.
Lil’ Wayne finally has a due date that doesn’t require him to watch placenta hit the floor. After several setbacks his rock album will hit stores on December 15. I am sending a mass text to all my white friends as we speak. Couldn’t he just buy more t-shirts from Hot Topic and call it a day?
Quick Flicks: Vivica A. Fox At Mr. Chow
Vivica, like any other whore for propaganda, loves to spend whatever little monies they have to go to places where the paparazzi is sure to find them. Amazing how people lives revolves around what letter of the alphabet they can be categorized in.
She was photographed exiting Mr. Chow’s [that food can't be that good] looking like she didn’t want to photographed at first, but then realized that playing hard to get doesn’t pay the bills, and smiled. I guess she feels that since she doesn’t have to pay paps to follow her like Gabrielle and Ciara [and Rihanna before "Umbrella," nobody was checking her], she is still in the C-lister category in Hollywood. TRAGIC.
Joe, The Textbook Case of a Dramatic Cunt
I have nothing against Joe other than the fact that he has the personality of an unused coffee filter. A cunty unused coffee filter. During an interview on Shade 45′s Lip Service the R&B crooner went all Kanye-esque [add it to your lexicons] after being paused for calling a vagina a bad boy before storming out. Girl, you be keeping your temper under control and shit.
*clanks two empty milk bottles together*
Not one to follow in the footsteps of fish, the equally irrelevant Chico DeBarge stuck around for the fun. Good for that guy for not being a wet blanket, shame on Joe for setting himself up for even more lip ash jokes.