Life was pretty damn good for Terrell Owens until Bank of America sent him a courtesy balance notification.

Crying the tears of a slave while trying his best to explain the state of his finances to anyone who would listen, viewers of ‘The T.O. Show’ couldn’t help but feel sorry for the current NFL free agent until they realized a major part of his money woes could have been solved by properly preparing for skeet off.

Terrell Owens’ financial situation is so dire, he filed papers in three separate child support cases to have his payments lowered because he makes ZERO DOLLARS this according to court docs obtained by TMZ.

As TMZ first reported, a bench warrant was issued for T.O.’s arrest after he missed a court date with one baby mama … to whom he’s trying to lower child support payments.

Turns out T.O. has three OTHER baby mamas and over the past few months he’s filed to have his payments reduced with two of them (and, according to his rep, he plans to file for a modification of support for the third).

For those of you counting at home, here’s the scorecard …

Baby Mama #1, Monique Reynolds
T.O. and Monique have an 11-year-old son together. According to the papers, he paid $20,000/month in support until last year, when it was reduced to $11,202. He also gave her $100,000 to buy a house.

Baby Mama #2, Kimberly Floyd
They share a 7-year-old daughter, for whom TO was ordered to pay $20,000/month for back in 2005. In 2008, they agreed to drop that to $15,000.

Baby Mama #3, Samelia Miller
Miller gave birth to a son back in 2006. He was ordered to pay $13,400/month in support.

Baby Mama #4, Melanie Paige Smith
T.O. was ordered to pay $5,000/month for their daughter back in 2007. This is the only case where T.O. has not yet requested a reduction … though his rep says he plans to ask for a modification.

In each of the cases where T.O. is requesting a reduction in child support payments, he says in his declaration, “My currently monthly income is zero ($0).”

In the papers, T.O. also claims to pay $62,366/month for various properties and says his home in Georgia is in foreclosure. He says he put all but two of his homes up for sale.

A rep for T.O. tells TMZ, “He has tried to keep paying all of these mothers what they were used to year after year, basically putting himself into a financial crisis. He has always paid his child support payments and loves his kids.”

The rep says each modification case is still ongoing.

Kelis has no intentions of inviting Katy Perry to her next Tupperware party. The sole beneficiary of profits made from all bedazzled nigger jackets manufactured in 2008 reportedly vented “Katy Perry is crap. It’s just poor pop. Her name might be on her stuff but that doesn’t mean it’s any good,” according to Britain’s Daily Star newspaper.

Perry’s Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.) topped Billboard Hot 100 mainstream chart in August, giving her a fifth number one from the same album, matching Michael Jackson’s previous record who also manage the high five in 1987 and 1988 with hits from his album Bad. Her record-breaking streak continued earlier this month when she became the first artist in Billboard’s Adult Pop Songs chart history to achieve four number ones from the same album.

So for Ms. Rogers the question remains:

Throughout the duration of her time on ‘Basketball Wives’ Meeka Claxton has been about as popular as the kid in home room who manages to smell like garlic chicken broth before 8am with the rest of the cast.

The final “fucking factor” can easily be pegged as the zero interaction she is likely to have with Drunk Ass Tami and her fat bitch walk if show producers were to keep her around. And that type of boring story line just doesn’t justify trying to include her into the premium remy hair budget for the season.

All the scandalous ladies of Basketball Wives were back at it again Monday night during the reunion show. Between Tami and Meeka, Royce, Jennifer, and Evelyn and Meeka’s earring designer, the show was one catty 60 minute drama fest…I can’t wait to see part two next week!

In related news, BW‘s producer, Shaunie O’Neal, recently sat down for an interview with Chicago’s Power 92 during which she revealed that Meeka won’t be returning for another season (no surprise there). Of the situation with Meeka, Shaunie simply said, “It just didn’t work out.” She also admitted Royce may be missing from the cast next season. (Dr Jays)

Here’s a joke with no punchline for you to snicker at: After months of non-payment the contents of a storage unit once rented by former Destiny’s Child member Farrah Franklin were sorted through and later placed on eBay.

Memorabilia from the auction include personal pictures of Farrah along with the rest of the Killer Knowles Klan posing with celebrity friends as well as separately, a copy of the original signed contract by all members, her personal calender from 2000 listing daily activities with the group, a key to Houston she received in 2000, a birthday card from Michelle (who was probably the only one to ever give a damn) and a bunch of other shit stans across the globe would rub their genitalia against in order to feel just a little bit closer to Beyonce.

But the highlight for shade enthusiasts is easily the original letter sent from Mathew Knowles terminating her ass. All types of dreadful.

CLICK HERE TO SEE ITEMS FROM THE AUCTION

You would be better off not judging my recent fascination with all things Arsenio Hall, thanks.

Arsenio Hall seems to figure that a 17-year rest is long enough. Having quit his iconic late-night talk show in 1994, Hall was asked this afternoon during a PBS panel at TCA about an Ed Sullivan Comedy Special premiering Aug. 6 whether he’d consider making a comeback.

“I’d have to change my name to Nick Cannon and live with Mariah (Carey),” he joked. “But I think it’s a perfect time for that personally. Give me a microphone. My son’s 11 and he can drive himself to school. I’m ready to host!”

When a critic pressed if he was serious, Hall acknowledged, “It’s pretty crowded out there. I’m not sure if it’s too crowded
for a 55-year-old guy to re-emerge, but if they give me a little daylight I’m gonna slide into it.” (source)

While I could never get into Mo-Apostrophe-Nique yelling scriptures at me like a street preacher my thoughts are with all the faithful fans of The Mo’Nique Show (including Mama Fresh) this evening. Look on the bright side, the absence of The Mo’Nique Show nows leaves space and opportunity for The Magic Hour to return back to dominance. That’s right Debra Lee, get the cotton from under your fingernails and call Cookie to set some shit up!

Rodney Ho of Access Atlanta’s Radio & TV Talk writes:

At about 1:30 p.m., I called Rodney Perry, who was Mo’Nique’s sidekick on the show. He said he was running into a meeting and didn’t answer my question. While I was at lunch over at the mall court, at 1:40 p.m. EST, he texted me: “I was told indefinite hiatus.”

That’s a euphemism for canceled.

In an interview I did at 2:40 p.m., the stand-up comic said he enjoyed the experience working with Mo’Nique. “I’m selling out shows now,” he said. “That’s a win.” He heard the news from Mo’Nique’s husband but hasn’t spoken to the Oscar-winning actress yet. (He wouldn’t say when he knew about this, implying he has known for awhile.)

“We did some good work,” Perry said. “And I think the show is significant. There hasn’t been an outlet for people of color late night since Arsenio.”

The talk show, which Mo’Nique compared to a high-energy nightly party, lasted two seasons and had been taped in Turner Studios, which are now being used for BET’s show “Reed Between the Lines” through October. When I heard that earlier today, I wondered if that meant “Mo’Nique” was not coming back or had been moved to another studio. If her show were coming back, she would be taping by August. (Like many shows, it does not tape original episodes during the summer.)

Ron Isley definitely had something to do with this shit leaking out to the public. God forgives, Mr. Biggs doesn’t!

R. Kelly can’t catch a break. The singer, who underwent emergency throat surgery to drain an abscess in his tonsil last week, made headlines when it was recently revealed that his $2.9 million Chicago estate was in foreclosure because he was delinquent with payments. Now, The Detroit News reports that he owes nearly a million in unpaid taxes. The R&B star apparently needs some accounting assistance, as he owes a debt of exactly $837,000 to Uncle Sam.

Due to this outstanding tax bill, the IRS filed a tax lien against Kelly, 44, back on Jan. 6, 2010. It’s the second lien against the ‘I Believe I Can Fly’ singer as of late; the IRS just lifted a $1,036,858 lien against him last month.

With R. recovering from surgery, which is sidelining him for performing or touring for the foreseeable future, his earning potential is significantly hampered and hindered, further compounding this problem.

Remember when R. first got into some hot water due to that sex tape back in 2002? Now his troubles are concentrated in the financial realm. We hope he gets it together, because it can’t be fun having the tax man tapping at his chamber door to the tune of nearly a million bucks. We also hope the singer is healing now that he is post-op. (source)

Girl Scouts honorary den leader R. Kelly faces a $2.9-million foreclosure lawsuit on his 11,140-square-foot Olympia Fields mansion after failing to pay more than a year of mortgage payments. That’s a lot of Happy Meals.

Kelly’s home, which sits on a 3.7-acre lot, was constructed in the far southern suburb 11 years ago and its value has plummeted in recent years — falling 26 percent in its most recent appraisal to $3.8 million, as compared to its $5.2 million 2009 value, according to Crain’s. Therefore, Kelly, who has not lived in the home for more than a year, faces debts on the property that likely exceed its current value.

A person reportedly close to Kelly told Crain’s the singer had stopped making payments on the mortgage in order to force the bank to renegotiate the loan.

As Curbed pointed out, the foreclosure suit is not the first time Kelly has run into trouble with his Olympia Fields home. In 2006, the village reportedly sued him for keeping tour buses and dogs at the property and they forced him to demolish a guardhouse that he’d had built on the property without first obtaining the proper permits to do so. (source)

Social networking hook-ups can be tricky. After months of corresponding through Skype sessions with a self-anointed Twitter personality / occasional model (who just happens to only have web cam pictures available — yeah), former Duke University star point guard and top draft pick of the Cleveland Cavaliers Kyrie Irving finally met up with Jessica Jackson (better known as @RealMissHawaii) in person outside of a bar in North Carolina.

That’s when shit took a left.

Kyrie Irving has yet to play one minute in the NBA, but he’s already dealing with groupie troubles. The No. 1 pick of the Cleveland Cavs in the 2011 NBA Draft has filed a restraining order against Jessica Jackson.

According to reports by blacksportsonline, Jackson, who calls herself Miss Hawaii, threatened to stab Irving via a Twitter message and posted videos on YouTube blasting him.

Several months ago, Irving and Jackson began contacting each on Twitter and Skype. Jackson eventually traveled to North Carolina unannounced and approached Irving. But when Irving realized that Jackson did not look as good as the picture on her Twitter avatar, he was turned off and apparently attempted to end communication with Jackson. However, Jackson was hurt by Irving’s lack of attention and began threatening him.

Jackson has reportedly attempted to contact several other NBA and college athletes in the past and has far fetched dreams of being on VH-1′s “Basketball Wives.” (source)

VIDEO: MISS HAWAII GOES OFF ON KYRIE IRVING

Nice to see that I’m not the only fan of Lane Bryant’s convertible leopard print bra.

In my mind Jill Scott would make for the perfect kindergarten teacher. Her voice is soft, her smile is warm and she looks like she smells like fresh baked cookies most of the time. The soulful jawn’s ex-husband Lyzel Williams (whom she divorced back in 2001) wasn’t trying to stick his hand in her cookie jar during their marriage, though. And that pissed Jilly From Philly the hell off:

“One of the reasons my ex-husband and I broke up is that he stopped eating my food. He was pissed (off) for other reasons, but the best way to show me was by leaving what I’d made for him uneaten for days on the kitchen counter. It was a smack in the face”.

Hamburger Helper prepared with shredded cheddar cheese layered on top comes with a price in my household. After the cut check out what Crunksters our Facebook profile had to say about Lyzel saying no to Jill’s toast, two scrambled eggs and grits.

“If he was eating your food at first and than stopped than he was basically telling you I’m done with you and your raggity ass cooking. Truth be told you may not have been a cook to begin with and he ate it just to be nice. At the end of the day if he wasn’t honest than you didn’t really want to be with him in the first place. That is some immature stuff. I’m not happy so I’m not eating my food. I bet he wasn’t getting no “dessert” either though! I love you Jill, LOL.” — Darell

“I’m a chef-in-training, and I would definitely feel all sorts of damaged if my man didn’t eat my food. I’d definitely start questioning shit and think something was wrong. ugh, I’m a hot, sloppy mess, ain’t I?” — Carlos

“It sounds kinda petty and silly, but I’m serious about my food, too. I don’t cook for just any ninja and if I took the time, he’d better eat it. I’d have been hot if he didn’t. *double pause* Besides, can’t stand when folks waste food, it’s necessity a lot of folks don’t have.” — Juanita