Are you ready to get crunk for Christ?

Why can’t Christians let the heathens have their own songs? Especially songs like Waka Flocka Flame’s “No Hands.” When I hear this song I’m thinking, “hands on ya knees, hands on ya knees” versus fall on my knees and pray to the Lord.

I also noticed that there are gospel remixes to sexually-charged songs like “Motivation.” Whoa, savior? While I’m certain that Kelly Rowland loves her Bible, she didn’t make that song to get biblical. Why won’t you folks let her sin in peace?

I find this all to be selfish. Okay, so maybe I do adore the screwed and chopped version of “God In Me,” but I didn’t change the lyrics. Never once have I said anything like, “It’s the Pimp (C) in me!” I know my limits. It’s time holy rollers learned theirs.

No one wants to hear, “It ain’t no fun, if my Jesus can’t have none.” Or, “Say his name, say his name. When no one is around you say, ‘Jesus I love you,’ if you ain’t running games.” The same goes for, “Bless that demon that you like so bad. And when your with it, know that God’s in your head.” Oh yeah, a big no, too, for, ”Stop! Now the let mother blesser pray for y’all.”

CONTINUE READING AT THE CYNICAL ONES

When churchgoers shout out to performers to take their time its to ease their nervousness and anxiety. I doubt if Sister Spongerollers needed that particular pat on the back.

TMZ has learned the oft-incarcerated rapper, real name Earl Simmons, agreed to perform at the Morning Star Sanctified Church for a fundraiser this Saturday — and he’s doing it for free.

According to Pastor Barbara King, DMX and his family have been members of the congregation for eight months now and he really wanted to help raise money for repairs.

We’re told the school holding the event is amping up security because they’re unsure of what kind of crowd the convicted felon will draw. Tickets are going from $35-$40 a pop. [source]

Fresh: Why go to see DMX in concert when you can rent ‘This Is It’ from a Redbox for a $1 a day?

Justin: Or watch old James Brown concerts on VH1 Classic?

While her ex-beaver attempted  [and failed] to transform y’all on Twitter, the world’s most famous Cynthia Doll was being controversial in Venice

After a taking a trip on a gondola , the skimpily clad star tried to enter Saint Mark’s Basilica in the city’s famous Piazza San Marco.

But strict rules mean shoulders and legs must be covered.

To beat the ban, she rustled up a makeshift ensemble which looked suspiciously like she had just grabbed two red tablecloths from a nearby restaurant.

You have to be one bold person to go into a church dressed in a miniskirt with your bra showing. Acting like that was a mission house in which hookers go into for counseling and hot meals.

If gospel artist Tonex believes that he has been keeping his fever under wraps up until now he should be evaluated. By Mashonda. On Twitter. With follow up questions provided by Norwood Young.

Never too far from controversy, gospel artist Tonex recently announced on Word Network’s “The Lexi Show” that he is attracted to men. After many years of speculation over his sexuality, the 34-year-old pastor of Truth Apostolic Community Church in San Diego said he has found comfort in putting the rumors to rest.

In a video interview on the show, Tonex, whose real name is Anthony Williams, described himself as a “free spirit,” and said he is not struggling with homosexuality.

“I think that when someone understands who they are sexually and they understand who they are as a person, it’s really difficult to label that,” Tonex said. “Other times I’m like, hm, I do want kids and I do very much love women…but at the same time we have to be honest with ourselves as to what it is that we have an affinity for.”

Tonex has released 24 gospel albums in the past 15 years and produced hit records for gospel and secular artists, winning six Stellar Awards and a Grammy nomination in 2004. But he has also had his share of pain—he had a four year marriage that ended in divorce, mourned the death of his father in 2006, and announced a short-lived retirement later that year before returning to the industry in 2007.

In the candid interview, Tonex shared his opinion on the public’s view of his personal life.

“It’s important for people to not be so caught up in who I like to sleep with, as much as I’m practicing safe sex or I’m in a monogamist relationship, no matter what that will be,” he said. [source]

Fresh!

I was about to go to bed when the devil whispered in my ear to go check on Brother Franklin. From the looks of it I’m glad I did. He’s still dancing in a brand new pair of sneakers no less . . . AT HIS ALBUM RELEASE PARTY.

I’ve given wings to a Fuckery Angel for Wednesday.

Godspeed.

- – Patrice

Giving honor and respect to Terry Thierry & Sister Hassana Chanelle for blessing my inbox with this. Can’t afford a Mac? No worries! Just visit the Apple store and get to spreading God’s world!

Hey Fresh!

This past Thursday 3 of my cousins (my aunts was on it) graduated from high school. Although I was beaming with pride in the car on the way there, I was grinning for a different reason when I pulled into the parking lot and saw the truck in the flicks. When the (long ass) ceremony was over, I stopped to take this flicks on my phone. Now I didn’t see the owner of this great truck but I’m assuming they were black. Hope you can use it them!

- – Leisha.Bug

Is your Holy Ghost shout game falling short? Feel like you could use more pep in your two step? David’s Shoutin’ School has you all covered. Duke the Devil is my Mama’s signature move. Thanks AyYoEb!

When I read one of the comments over at Tha Feedback that said LaTonya Blige-DeCoasta needs the assistance of auto tune on the gospel song “It’s Coming” [which features sister Mary J. Blige] I thought to myself that it couldn’t be that bad and if it is I’m not going to say anything. I’m not trying to block my blessings!

Let’s just say my soul has been chopped and screwed.

C+D previously featured the smooth vocal styling of LaTonya back in ‘08 in case you missed it. Let everything that has bref praise Kang Jeezus! Thanks Nat!

Listen To “It’s Coming”