At last, the streets of Ladera Heights are civil once again.
Officials with the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department said today that they plan to close the misdemeanor battery case against Chris Brown.
The decision comes after Frank Ocean revealed that he’ll “choose sanity” and will not press charges against Yellow Cake in connection with a windmill fight the two entertainers had in a parking lot last week. Remind me to use that one the next time I file a police report of my own.
“No criminal charges. No civil lawsuit,” Ocean wrote on his Tumblr. “But as a man I am not a killer. I’m an artist and a modern person. I’ll choose sanity. No criminal charges. No civil lawsuit. Forgiveness, albeit trite, is wisdom.”
According to producer Michael Uzowuru’s account, Rabid Beaver tried to “beat the living shit out of” Ocean when he arrived at the studio with Frank and a third man named Chito, and the space clearly reserved for Ocean at Westlake Studios was taken.
Uzowuru says the front desk informed the trio that the orange Lambo belonged to CB, and 10 minutes later the magical creature emerged with a “big dude” and a “skinnier dude” — and when Frank told Chris, “You parked in my spot, move” that’s when Summer’s Eve skeeted everywhere.
Where is A-Wax from ‘Menace II Society’ when you need him to talk sense into two squabbling ass negros?
Uzowuru ended his account by commenting, “”I don’t know what type of demons Chris is facing, but I hope he clears them all and finds a new life rooted in love and light.”
In a hopeless place, no doubt. Wonder how Rihanna’s vagina is looking this week.