Do not fret Crunksters, for the freshwater creature who builds dams of love and resulting chaos is on his way back to our needy hearts! Chris Brown, according to the House of Bitchie, is preparing a media blitz to win back the public’s trust and give the DJs a reason again to play “Take You Down” for the kids at the Junior Prom this upcoming Spring.

His new album, tentatively titled Graffiti is set to drop this upcoming  Fall, but before that, he plans include a sit-down with Larry “Phoning it in cause I’m old as Hell” King and performing the moonwalk with Gremlins during various dates on the America’s Most Wanted Tour.

Hopefully the Beaver that hails from Tappahannock, Virginia, has learned his lesson and use his teeth for eating and carefully pronouncing his words [Did y’all see that apology, homeboy had a lisp. I didn’t even know!] instead of as a weapon of mass destruction.

Ta-da, I was nice. Didn’t even throw shade today.