Photographer extraordinaire and all around good dude Maurice Garland spent his past Saturday surrounded by plenty of random niggatry on the video set for “Trap Going Ham.” My time is precious and I strive hard to divide the pie but I would be willing to drop my entire hoe shit filled itinerary to be son’s intern!

For the full fuckery fest please visit his site. This post does not serve his tale justice. SHAM. FUCKING. WOW.

The place is gated up now, but hell, it was gated up when people were living there. Barb wire and the whole nine. The only difference is that the gate is actually locked now. Anyways, they shot some pretty interesting scenes there to say the least.

When I meant interesting I actually meant when the random chick drove up to the scene asked what was going and rendered some of her services for the cause.

The final scene was supposed to go down in front of the Auburn Food Mart. When we got there a certain gentleman imposed himself onto the scene. Saying “ya’ll need to put pimpin in this video.” When the cameras entertained his shit talking he immediately switched gears demanding money for his time. Of course no one payed attention. Feeling disrespected “pimpin” went digging in the trash can and found a florescent light blub and came back swinging it like he was a Darth Vader.

Right around that time I started hearing a sound…like a live wire hitting water. It kept getting closer and closer. Then out of nowhere some dude is walking past us with a taser. Yes, a taser. How nghs got tasers, I don’t know. All I know is out of all the possible weapons that could have been on set, that was the one I was most fearful of.

Of course not 10 minutes went by without it getting passed around and someone eventually getting tased. Unfortunately it was “pimpin”

Anyways, the shoot carried on and just when I thought it couldn’t get any realer…it did. The idea of Pill serving in front of the store came up and since it made sense, folks was with it. They chopped up peppermint to make fake crack sacks and everything. Insulted, the crackhead who was going to be in the scene said she had the real shit and that they should use that instead. They declined.

Determined to keep it real, the J in the scene offered to smoke the crack infront of the camera. When she did that shit, I was like aight, time to go shawty. I felt like this dude I saw on Def Comedy Jam years ago. When he said he went to a party, smoking weed, and got offended when people started doing cocaine, heroin and crack. He said “oh hell nah, ya’ll doing DRUGS!”