Hey, my C+D family — Kid Fury here again. I just wanted to stop by and let everyone know that I am holding a farewell ceremony for Mariah Carey today. After her surprise marriage to Earthworm Jim Nick Cannon and a “love story” honeymoon at Six Flags Magic Mountain (I know you can’t and neither can I), it is obvious that the Butterfly has fluttered away from her mind and become a lost cause. Mama told me that, “Sometimes you just have let folks be crazy”. I blame Nick, who must have some sort of covert pheromones in his semen, for this fuckery.

So, I would just like to say to Mariah — girl, bye…forever. Please if you have any parting words for these heifers, drop them off. Bless ya’ll hearts.