Shaq and Va’Shaundya [I would want people calling me Shaunie too, shit] look like they are trying to give black love a chance again. Fantastic! But I can’t seem to get their monthly expenses out of my head.

It went a little something like this:

$24,300 on gas

$17,220 on clothes

$156,116 on mortgages

$110,505 on vacations

$60,417 on gifts

$26,560 on babysitters

$6,730 on laundry and dry cleaning

$2,305 on pet care

$1,620 on music and magazines

$1,495 on cable television

$114,946 miscellaneous

And $o on moisturizing the big man’s situation – - damn shame. Scruffy can get a new flea collar studded with rhinestones but buying a bottle of cocoa butter lotion from Fred’s is out of the question? Jerzee Monet, help me understand.