Big Gay Al And Star
Big Gay Al and Star Jones On Vacation (sorry couldn’t resist)
Pictures are worth 1,000 words . . .
Archive for July, 2005
Being Bobby Brown Episode Four Summary
Being Bobby Brown Episode Four Summary
As promised last week, the Brown clan decides to venture off into the wilderness this week by going on a nice little camping trip. It started off at first as a males only type of party which included Bobby, Bobby Jr., Tommy, and Pops (I’ll talk about his nutty ass more later).
- The episode gets off to a familiar start as Bobby decides to go shopping for shit he absolutely does not need. Let me also be clear: Bobby loves his guns. I couldn’t believe my eyes went his nigga started to pick out all types of crazy heat. That shit has got to be illegal. I mean, doesn’t Mr. Brown have a wrap sheets long as Beyonce’s weave?
- Fast forward to later on that night. The guys camp around the fire and chill out basically. Bobby enjoys a few hot dogs that may prove themselves to be lethal later.
- Then Pop Brown shows us where exactly Bobby got his dancing skills from. Yo, I think he deserves his own spin off show. I would watch it. I watch this shit so you know I’m down for whatever. After Pop’s funky chicken routine its time to hit the sheets. Just one thing, Bobby Jr. keeps passing gas in the tent. Pop believes that this comes from “all those damn beans” they was eating. I second that motion. . .
- The next morning Bobby Sr. Receives a phone call from wifey informing him that she is on her way up. The episode has been pretty Whitney-less from this point but the tables are about to turn.
- Whitney arrives and the sweet coo’s start to begin almost automatically. If you haven’t been keeping up with the Brown’s sex life just know that they like to get done. They talk about it almost every two minutes.
- The execs at Bravo love adding those cooning moments we all have come to hate. Bobby and Whit start to do their own version of Fire by Earth, Wind, and Fire, (water, heart….Captain Planet!). Ignant.
- A few scenes later and we have yet another niggerish confrontation. This time it is with Bob, who is also enjoying the serenity of the lake. Bobby and Whitney tells him that he doesn’t know who they are talking to when Bob says something slick. That’s right! The angry negro in America rears its ugly head again.
- As always, Whitney starts bitching and decides the trip is over. While waiting on Bobby and crew to finish packing up and out, she cracks the pages on a magazine open. The aforementioned Beyonce gets love from Whitney. She also would like a wedding invitation. Yeah, that would be real interesting. Bobby and Whitney at your damn wedding, right.
A Glimpse Into The Future
Happy Mother’s Day.
Blah
Nas = Homeboy In Outer Space
Hip hop star Nas was left terrified after witnessing an alien spacecraft fly over Los Angeles four years ago.The rapper- who recently married R&B beauty Kelis - is now adamant there is life on other planets. He says, “I’ve seen the ship.” Four years ago in LA, I fucking saw a UFO. If you’d seen it you’d fucking bug.”In the papers they said they were testing missiles.”Right. That’s what they say. Missiles is bullet-shaped.”
I’m too tired to even begin the ridicule session. Who knew that counting crackas, I mean, people’s money all day long in a bank could be tiring. I will say this though, Halle Berry loves oral!
Don’t forget, When Crackheads Attack comes on tonight on Bravo. I’ll recap tomorrow as always.
Buzz Notes
50 Beats Pussy Up, Literally
Autographs are so pass?. 50 Cent left a female fan with a far more memorable souvenir when herecently visited London. The charming rapper took her back to his hotel from China White and shagged her so hard that her vagina was torn. A hospital visit was required to stitch up the damage.
It’s Not That Serious
Star Jones has acquired a scary lawyer. She was so ticked off about Philadelphia shock jock Patty Jackson’s recent column claiming that Al Reynolds visited L.A. gay bars after the BET Awards that she sicced Hollywood pit bull Bert Fields on the hapless Jackson - who immediately issued a retraction and apology. So are Fields and Jones the new match made in heaven? Yesterday Jones’ flack, Brad Zeifman, E-mailed Lowdown: “When Star needs to make important decisions in her professional or personal life, she hires the best people in the business to advise her. There is no question that Mr. Fields falls into that category.”
Star Jones has acquired a scary lawyer. She was so ticked off about Philadelphia shock jock Patty Jackson’s recent column claiming that Al Reynolds visited L.A. gay bars after the BET Awards that she sicced Hollywood pit bull Bert Fields on the hapless Jackson - who immediately issued a retraction and apology. So are Fields and Jones the new match made in heaven? Yesterday Jones’ flack, Brad Zeifman, E-mailed Lowdown: “When Star needs to make important decisions in her professional or personal life, she hires the best people in the business to advise her. There is no question that Mr. Fields falls into that category.”
We Belong Together
Snoop Dogg no longer wants to divorce his wife of eight years, Shante Broadus. The rapper has also blamed the music industry on their split - after admitting he had been unfaithful to the mother of his three children. He confessed in an interview with MTV: “I fell back in love with my wife and kids. A lot of times you get cloudy.This music industry is a mother, man, and it’ll take your vision and blur it. “But I need my wife and my kids in my life.”
Snoop Dogg no longer wants to divorce his wife of eight years, Shante Broadus. The rapper has also blamed the music industry on their split - after admitting he had been unfaithful to the mother of his three children. He confessed in an interview with MTV: “I fell back in love with my wife and kids. A lot of times you get cloudy.This music industry is a mother, man, and it’ll take your vision and blur it. “But I need my wife and my kids in my life.”
It Ain’t Over Yet Bitches!
On July 5 at Chicago’s Esquire movie theater, R. Kelly screened his five-part mini-movie “Trapped in the Closet” and gave onlookers an added treat as well: The Pied Piper debuted the songs for chapters six through 10 of “Trapped in the Closet” and even acted out the words to one of the episodes before hosting a party at Le Passage. Over the weekend, Kelly began shooting videos for “Trapped in the Closet” chapters six through 10, which all continue a central story. Production is said to be wrapping this week, and as with the predecessors, Kelly is co-directing. (continue reading)
The Artist Formly Known As Peedi Crakk
…God is watching. This is the start of a new beginning. It’s no longer Peedi Crakk - - it’s Peedi Peedi. I’m dropping Crakk. I’m not dropping it because of any other artist. I’m only dropping it ’cause I feel I don’t wanna promote the negativety that kids might get from the name. I get a lot of mothers ask me, “Why Crakk?” And I don’t have no explanation for it; that was the name given to me from the streets. I’m on the biggest label in hip-hop. Why not make a better decision? And I’m not supporting no more violence in my raps, or try my best not to. Everything is not going to be all positive, like me going to college or me watering flowers, ’cause that’s not what my life consists of. But I know better, so what I went through–being in and out of jail, selling drugs, and shootings and all that type of negative shit that I have survived though–I don’t have to teach the youth that. The youth don’t know no better, so if they hear Peedi Crakk say, “Yo, if a nigga say something to me, I’ma clap him,” they like, “If Peedi Crakk said it, it must be all right then”. It’s not all right. I’m letting ‘em know that.
Pictures of the Week
Pictures of the Week
Normally I don’t post cracka ass celebs on my site (reverse racism bitches, just kiddin’ before you start sending hate mail) but today I’ll make an exception. At first glance Lindsay looks pretty cracked out as usual.
Now peep her getting felt up my Anna Nicole Smith’s deceased husband’s cousin Gerald. Okay, I made thatlast part up but damn, that’s crazy. I told ya’ll last week that homeless people were the new Ugg boots and ya’ll thought I was tripping . . .
Hey Lloyd, I don’t care how “good” you think your hair is please don’t do this shit ever again.
Check out Loon at his birthday party looking like he’s fresh off of the prison bus. I guess that is what happens when you’re a Bad Boy artist.
Upgrade: Dame Dash and Racheal Roy out with the kids.
Downgrade: Shar Jackson and ALL them damn kids.
The Mad Surreal Life
The Mad Surreal Life
Remember this face? It’s Shock G, the one who put the satin on your panties. After years of making wack ass music post Digital Underground he is finally doing hip hop a favor and retiring. Woo hoo! Let’s all get together and buy this negro a plaque for his past accomplishments. The Humpty Hump man says music is driving him to do drugs and making him depressed which is understandable. If I had a $40 budget video in rotation on UnCut after having a pretty okay career in the early 90’s I would be a melancholy also. I remember back when the “Humpty Dance” came out - - I might’ve been all of seven years old maybe? Any how, some people just need to realize when their time is up. Of course there are a few people who this general rule of thumb does not apply to but this nigga ain’t one. Sorry to be so harsh but no one gives a damn about his “retirement”. His ass should be on the next season of The Surreal Life.Speaking of which, I would like to take this time out to conduct a little poll. If you could watch anyone on the next season of The Surreal Life who would you like to see?
For those who do not know about the show, they basically throw seven “celebrities” (the reason for the quotation marks are these 90 percent of the cast aren’t really relevant to the entertainment biz anymore) inside of a house and watch the drama unfold. Past hip hop negros who have been apart of the cast include Flava Flav and Da Brat. During the duration of the show the are presented with certain missions and challenges they must complete. Yadda yadda yadda.
Superhead Tells All Part 2
‘Superhead Tells All’ Update
Last month I hit ya’ll with information about Superhead’s new book. Here’s the link via BC of an interview she gave with those gossiping bitches at Hot 97. Very interesting if I do say so myself, very.
Edit: If you want some additional juicy excerpts from the book, check out Hollyhood Blogazine. This is one of new favorite negrotainment blogs also so show some love!
On Ray J . . .
I remember vividly the night he recorded the song that would change everything. ‘Where Do We Go from Here’ was a song about meeting someone and spending so much time with them, even beginning to love them, and wanting to know if it could, or should, be more. Ray stood in the recording booth, belted out that song, and accompanied it with tears. He cried, and I cried witnessing it. I loved this boy so much and wanted nothing more than to stay with him. But I knew that one day, I would have to go, that one day he would know who I had been with and render me unworthy of the affection he was now showing me. (more)
On Usher . . .
I instantly took all of him into my mouth. He was immediately aroused and lay back in ecstasy while touching my most intimate parts. I’d had more than my share of martinis at the bar before arriving on the set, and it seemed as if I reached my sexual peak all at once, in the backseat with him. With every touch, I shivered. With every lick, he squirmed. I was ready, and so was he, and before we knew it, we had arrived at the hotel. (more)
Chris Tucker Is Acting Like A Diva
What’s Up With Chris?
Chris Tucker is being a diva and holding up production of Rush Hour 3 because he’s making too many demands and angering co-star Jackie Chan, who is old and wants to get PAID.
He can’t be doing those stunts much longer. Says Chan of Tucker, “He’s still a new actor. How many movies has he made? Two movies have already made him very famous and made him a lot of money. He needs to learn slowly.”
Translation: “That’s me being nice. If you don’t make this movie, I’m gonna start talking about Why you always wear those sunglasses indoors motherfucker. And, I’m gonna call Chris Rock. Schmon!”